zodiac
replying on Strange Days, Indeed by Bachus
21 Mar 2004, 9:16 AM
Michale Graves, not Danzig. The mistake is Slate's, as the Times calls him 'a former singer for The Misfits.'
Which former frontman of the Misfits?
"The NYT's 'Sunday Styles' section takes a look at an intriguing sub-subculture now coming out of the woodwork: conservative punks, who opt for red-state values regardless of the color of their hair. The former frontman of The Misfits, now an online political columnist, maintains that conservatism can be pretty punk-rock after all: 'I look like someone who should be hanging out with Marilyn Manson â in fact I have hung out with Marilyn Manson. It doesn't affect what my morals are.'" - SLATE.COM
The best part is the 'surprise' at the end, when you realise it's not real, it's just a dream.
The point is, I've written something like a thousand rhyming poems since high school. It's getting hard for me to find new rhymes or structures. My line breaks are arbitrary in that I try to make the rhyme come at an unexpected part of the sentence, almost never at the period or some tidy clause-end. But if I didn't have rhymes I would have no idea how to line-break. Really. I've tried, like in that dreadful 'Joe-Joe', but it feels like utter bullshit to put in breaks where there's no reason to. I respect a lot people who write good free verse (including some here), but I can't understand how they don't feel like flaming bullshit poseurs doing it.
You should reneame this "Reflections of a College Freshman".
'Bowl' doesn't rhyme with 'pull'. Check and mate.
Unoriginal.
Meaning aside - which is fine, the flow of this is a few extra words past something that I might like very much.
It has a musical flow to it that I often strive for.
But I'm not thrilled with some of the simple descriptors and imagery - while the cadence is melodic, the language is uncomfortable.
Does that make sense?
windy warm
formidable
long and tenderly - could do without those, in particular.
Mediocrity code: 20841404
-6-
Hi! I have given this poeme the following code: 20D6B001
Why not decode it at http://www.mycgiserver.com/~prawne/medio
Are you sure you didn't see yourself, someone should fuck your shit up for writing this.
what do you mean "research"?and what do you mean "i am not believing the murder thingy"?i appreciate your comment but it dosent make sense
Needs better research. I am not believing the murder thingy
(weird guilt-ridden Puritan dreams.)
A Puritan woman's night-dress is formidable to protect her from her husband's (and her own) sensuality - which, as you should know, is shameful and wicked.
I don't know why sugar is like a skin. I just imagined what it's like to touch it with a tongue. And I wanted it to be sensual. I guess if I have to explain it, though, it didn't work. I'm trying to make less sense recently, but not too little.