jasondingus
on Guilt by singinkygal
31 Dec 2003, 8:12 AM
Tell them all about it honey!
J-lo doesn't have anything on you suga!
You go girlfriend you just may be the next Emily Dickinson!
Been there, stupidity is pervasive when alcohol is involved. Be more specific, discribe the scene, Mangled metal and broken glass, A pool of blood,
A life gone in a flash.
Screaming sirens pierce the air,
Broken dreams scattered here and there.
I'm not a poet, but something like that.
I like it, a well written poem, But Seraphic and manic don't seem to fit.
You can't keep hiding for the rest of your life.
Whew. I thought I was the only buffon here. ha! Needs tweaks. Verbalize with volume and you'll find them. high nines.
Something for a nothing in everyones' nowhere. Brilliant. Small nits. I would make the leaves and wind
whos, they are accompanyment to the man. I don't like the duplicitous rain, unless it has specific meaning, explain? (Crib)is slang for house in America find something else please. I'm totally lost with the crownings. Sorry. "Jettison of the richer man" also brilliant. And I liked the use of mackintosh. I don't mind going to the dictionary at all. Even for this small stuff, the gross of it is velly goot, yah.
Thank you sir. I will be visiting yours, post haste. In the mean time, (Dale) can be found at http://poemranker.com/jsp?id=25305
Caducus
on Chaos & his dreamchild (genesis) --Revised Edition-- by SupremeDreamer
31 Dec 2003, 6:07 AM
Liked it, one reason i did was because it has at least 2 parts it can be ended with an impact.
Loved the 1st 3 big time.
haha! funny, no? I give it an 8, because i just thought that was hilarious!
I LOVE IT!
more than one word
That's ummmm tmi!!!
ok it needs working
ummm ok???