So rife with clerical errors and rancid splats of cack that after absorbing this secretion I think I'm going to have to have a lie down. Yet again you prove yourself the master of giving bloated pieces absurdly pretentious and insipidly whimsical titles. "Diary of a Hayseed" my arse. No doubt this piece was intended to 'decorate the reader's window' with a beautiful collage of midwestern serenity. But after the appalling ending, made even worse by the painful, yet touchingly poignant use of an ellipsis, the only thing decorating my window was a giant shower of vomit...

[X] AABB rhyming scheme [X] About romantic love [X] About writing [X] About suicide or self-mutilation [X] Arbitrary indentation [X] Arbitrary line breaks [X] Autobiographical but in the third person [X] Clerical errors [X] Clichéd imagery (gazing out of window, pits of despair) [X] Clichéd rhymes (love/above, heart/apart) [X] 'Depression' words (putrid, wretched, darkness) [X] Devoid of alliteration or any such linguistic embellishments ******[_] Devoid of rhyme [X] Devoid of simile, reification or any such literary devices ******[_] Devoid of wondrous or fantastical imagery [X] Drug reference [X] Elves, unicorns, etc. [X] Insipidly whimsical or zany [X] Internet shorthand or emoticons [X] Leaving rant [X] Lower case [X] 'Lyrics' [X] Melodramatic [X] Naively religious or superstitious [X] Obsessed with femininity [X] Overabundance of ellipses [X] Pointedly unanswered questions [X] Rage against the machine [X] Reference to the author's 'social life' [X] Repetition of a word or phrase to the point of nausea [X] Sanctimonious [X] Self-obsessed [X] Sentimental [X] Smugly-named protagonist [X] Thesaurophilia [X] Untitled [X] Vicarious wish fulfilment

Hmmm. It's easy to get lost in this, the first time you read it. The second time it seems easier to understand. It must be painful, not knowing. Only one R in buried. 9.

I love it, it has a certain melancholy ring of truth. 'It's so hard to see reality...' Yea, and you never really know what it's worth unless you've been on the other side of that fine line.Anyway, I enjoyed this one. 10.

[_] AABB rhyming scheme [X] About romantic love [_] About writing [_] About suicide or self-mutilation [_] Arbitrary indentation [X] Arbitrary line breaks [_] Autobiographical but in the third person [_] Clerical errors [_] Clichéd imagery (gazing out of window, pits of despair) [_] Clichéd rhymes (love/above, heart/apart) [_] 'Depression' words (putrid, wretched, darkness) [X] Devoid of alliteration or any such linguistic embellishments [X] Devoid of rhyme [X] Devoid of simile, reification or any such literary devices [X] Devoid of wondrous or fantastical imagery [_] Drug reference [_] Elves, unicorns, etc. [_] Insipidly whimsical or zany [_] Internet shorthand or emoticons [_] Leaving rant [X] Lower case [_] 'Lyrics' [X] Melodramatic [_] Naively religious or superstitious [_] Obsessed with femininity [_] Overabundance of ellipses [X] Pointedly unanswered questions [_] Rage against the machine [X] Reference to the author's 'social life' [_] Repetition of a word or phrase to the point of nausea [_] Sanctimonious [X] Self-obsessed [_] Sentimental [_] Smugly-named protagonist [_] Thesaurophilia [_] Untitled [_] Vicarious wish fulfilment

makes me feel inadequate, somehow works like this make me wonder why i even bother writing 8/10

I give it a five... hehe.. see you soon little demi-sungod

pick up the knife and cut those ropes

That's heavy.

I just picked up an 8 ball, cheers. Salton Sea you later.

a masterpiece. 10