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on Keanu Vs The mystery of life by Shardik
7 Mar 2003, 1:53 PM
spin it.
speaking of hos, i wrote a poem for you, molasses. slurp.
Sucks, delete. Try writing some poems about the deafening silence that is living alone in the world or something. 9.
whateva ho
-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
replying on Harry Potter and the philosophers stone by ==Doylum
7 Mar 2003, 1:43 PM
zzinnia66 doesn't get "wet". Rather, she secretes a nutrient-filled mucus from her palms and thighs when she senses danger.
Fair enough.
-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
replying on i will not come to bangladesh by lost in america
7 Mar 2003, 12:49 PM
When you think of the words "stereo" and "carbonated", do you also think of the word "stereowash"? I do. Now.
did you write this poem? i guess i am confused? sorry, i am not trying to be a better writer than anyone. and i think it odd that you are trying to influence a personal opinion. i thought we were supposed to give poems a number rank. that is all i did, but here you go.
lol.
You might be better then me on a certain poetic level. But I have a hungry mind and all the time in the world. If you gave this a four though i would rather you remove your vote. Simply because this piece is better then a 4 and we both know it. Plus, it's very personal to me, and i would consider that a favor. Otherwise, we have nothing more to discussw
That's good shit. Haven't i read this somewhere? Glad i didn't put my foot in my mouth. You are a better poet, and i could learn from you. Thanks, you're right i am still a boy, but i'm growing fast. Great poem.
A good try! But if you won't come to Bangladesh then that's racist. Apart from that, completely ace! I especially enjoyed the following:
(i) Great use of random line breaks and indentation to make the piece seem more profound!
(ii) Great use of lower case letters for the entire piece to make it look minimalist and deliberately understated!
(iii) Excellent reminiscing about how you both got sloppy drunk one night; those were the days - carefree, young and free-spirited, and carefree, and free, and free, and young. What memories. What happiness. What originalty.
(iv) Frankingstein is the name of the MONSTER. NOT the doctor who created him. It's a common misconception, and one you ought to consider before handing in your application for frozen justification.
sorry, i wasn't trying to be negative. i was just saying what i thought. i didn't realise you were four and wrote this. i guess it is good then.
That's good though. Still not tapping hidden ideas however, but damn fine work.
it's okay, but hardly profound.
Oh old one pray tell what we should do different to shake the youthfull energy that we set out for in this piece, and obviously achieved. How would you edit this then? What was young about it other then it being from the perspective of a 4 year old? What does young mean to you? I hope you're not elderly with alzheimers and lost in an rv? I have been writing poetry on a better level then you, and quite longer then you assume, i assure you. Don't jump to conclusions you can't back up with physical work. I will take a look at your work first though, before i stick your head in my mouth. Let's take a look? shall we?
i gotta travel with you.
funny and completely worthless at the same time.
meagre is a british spelling methinx. not? thanx for your praise, i know from whom it comes!
Yes, but I found that out after getting a couple of high hits Mr. Foster, and was like "Who cares ? (having momentarilly forgotten your insistant scholastic hang ups and scoutings ahead)." It adds a LAYER of normal human error that I rather enjoy sir, called the perfection in being imperfectly aware, always. A permenant mushroom trip. An inbetween world, between the genders, the words, the cities, the atmospere and space. the water on the shore. the constant change from right and wrong to night and day. With a shell at my ear I heard birth dying to live again. Somewhere else.