T'ien
replying on Maliced flame by T'ien
26 Nov 2002, 1:41 PM
thanks im glad u think the re-do is better
but, it's not about poland. it's about being bipolar.
(no, it's not about being bi in poland either.)
i think it was me influenced by your heritage
just like poland. hmmm. i wonder if my czechoslovakian hertiage influenced me subliminally...
the first part is angry, but it's more of a controlled anger, like that released on Poland back in '39. it weakens with the line "it won't be stopped." something about the timing of the rest is thrown off by this line and it doesn't fully recover (in my opinion).
I've got shasta daisies--in two locations--still going strong, along with aforementioned alyssum. (The cosmos gave up the ghost though.)
i said, "hail calendula" not "heil kalendula". sheisskopf.
clarify please--is the first part not angry? what tone do you see, and where does it weaken?
i have an Alusian named Calendula! 8 swastikas!
this is amazing...until the last two stanzas. i think your ire got the better of you and you let the words get away from you a little. knowing you, you probably did it on purpose and i'm missing the point.
The first stanza is sweet, how about working on the second?
rather trite. rather redundant. try for fresher images.
I like the mystery
like how red blood cells are made....in the marrow.
cool and calculated...a real savy tournequette. 9.
end with "fine" or "be", probably "be" is stronger or maybe, and then we'll see (as an added line) ah fuckit...it just left me a little wet in the vagina (blue balled) but mayhaps was the point 8.
they can also break a man's leg with one mighty tail swipe. komodo dragons are my favourite critters after kitties and spiders.
did you know that the komodo dragon can run up to thirty miles per hour, and has acidic bacterial infested saliva? better forget about the pickle and hide your chickens. Because breakfast sucks without eggs. take an 8.