-=SeTTle=-
on The TRust That Was Unreal (by WOOTNESS) by xanatos
27 Oct 2002, 7:03 PM
I saw someone who looked exactly like Chris Elliot today but he was selling postcards and knicknacks.
gsdjkdsl;sdljfkjfsd not bad
The purpose of poetry is not even to convey *a* mood, certainly not your fucking mood. You know, this goes to show how clueless most of the poets here are. Now, since the poem is so hilarious I will assume that this is a satire of bad poets and haiku in general. 9
not clever enough to work. Unless one "gets it" as soon as they read it, you can assume you haven't been clear enough. Why not "and when lust is a must / trust turns to dust"? Granted it's a bit of a cliche but it's a silly poem.
This poem is not total garbage and I even enjoyed it.
Crisp - overused, sun does not reflect on glass bevel to make rainbow, it refracts, the soul is not the sort of concrete entity with which strong haiku are built.
Totally excellent. Not justreadable but very interesting - I don't think I've ever read anything with much in common with this poem. Unusual sentiment.
Sincerity alone is almost never enough for a poem to go on - this is an exception. Excellent work, try expanding the range of subject matters which you right about - don't just write about what you most strongly feel.
IT'S MY LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFE AND IT'S NOW OR NEVER - I DON'T WANNA *LIVE* FOR-EVER - I JUST WANNA LIVE WHILE I'M ALIVE.....IT'S...MY....LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The phrase "strong as an oak" is a really annoying cliche. Try "permanent as a conifer" or something.
This is like meta-angst. Pretty interesting stuff.
Yeah except for any thin paper or foil. And it's garbage for non-porous materials. And it dries rigid which makes it useless for gluing materials which are under any stresses (like wood, for instance). All your needs? You must go through a lot of fucking construction paper and glitter you fucking pansy.
do you know something we don't??
nice observation
i like the emotion of this poem. the last line doesn't sound quite right to me, though. try taking another look at it.
this is the stupidest thing i've ever read. really.
patient, are we? :D
dont u people get it?! there has to be a winner between opponents and since he's the only opponent.. duh.. you people don't know what POETRY IS!!!! ;P ;D
negative feedback is great. especially to someone like me who has never written poetry before. i thank you. i will heed your advise in future poems i write. now, just some advise for you. by all means as i said give negative feedback on someones work, if they are half as mature as they should be they know not to take any advise personally. however when people give offensive and negative PERSONAL feedback to someone, it can be quite damaging. your opening sentence in your reply does just that. fortunately, i recognised your criticism as an attempted constructiveness. try to be more careful because you may just offend someone more fragile than me. thanks again for your input.