replying on Round 27 by Dovina
28 Jan 2006, 10:44 AM
I tried that, and it worked alright. I guess your computer is fraught with glitchism. I prefer http://www.onelook.com/?loc=rz4&;w=*i
on Hailing Miriam by Ranger
28 Jan 2006, 9:44 AM
A flurry of great lines, and then the ending. Who is Lorelei? A mystical, colorful, and sad read.
on How small, this sleeping tiger by ecargo
28 Jan 2006, 9:32 AM
Poetically speaking, this is good. It has form, unusual expression, metaphor (I think), and harks of Frost. For those reasons, I'd vote 10. But the reason I did not, and did on Elderking's recent one, is that the best poem, in my faulty opinion, is not the best written, it's the Trojan Horse that smuggles titillation into my sheltered life. Not sexual titillation necessarily, but connection with myself. Yours does that as I feel the tiger's caged existance, and I think you're hinting at more, but what?
replying on Malice In Wonderland (edited) by Caducus
27 Jan 2006, 11:58 AM
Yes, I think this line need san (needs an) edit:
"watched her guilt rape seeded skin"
"watched her guilt rape seeded skin"
on Our Marriage by amanda_dcosta
27 Jan 2006, 11:51 AM
The meter is not so steady in this that you need devices like "ne'er" to maintain it. And why "learnt" not learned? The cross/toss rhyme seems unnecessary where rhyming is not the pattern. Likewise "'morrow." These poeticizing attempts only detract from you free style which has its own kind of poetry.
replying on My testament to free speech by Glasseyez
27 Jan 2006, 11:08 AM
Well, okay, you did it so well I thought it was you.
replying on Tree of Life by ALChemy
26 Jan 2006, 1:57 PM
That's a great scene. Wish I'd gotten it.
on My testament to free speech by Glasseyez
26 Jan 2006, 1:55 PM
You've given in to a popularized box called life. There's more out there than you say.
Thanks for the comment. The title is merely angst at how many times it takes in the boxing ring for a country to get it. Nothing special about the number 27.
The “paling” bit could be rewritten for clarity: “a viral infection permeates the collective mind, emitting technological devices, and erecting for itself a fence of sharp sticks, pointed upward, which serve as a neat collection of standard excuses against anyone who objects.”
The “paling” bit could be rewritten for clarity: “a viral infection permeates the collective mind, emitting technological devices, and erecting for itself a fence of sharp sticks, pointed upward, which serve as a neat collection of standard excuses against anyone who objects.”
replying on Tree of Life by ALChemy
25 Jan 2006, 9:15 PM
And can we know what they are?
on Glitterati by ecargo
25 Jan 2006, 6:43 PM
Dusel is one of those easy-to-be-bored-with party yuppies that spoil most parties with fluff and smirk at poets, and are the reason I seldom go to parties anymore, unless they're about something more. I'm surprised you didn't point out the poets' disruptive potential, unless you're saying they're the complicit kind who are no different from Dusel.
on Tree of Life by ALChemy
25 Jan 2006, 6:30 PM
Tree of Life could be from Genesis and Eden, or it could be the evolutionary tree of species. I go with the latter, but it's vague.
on Sinning Sinners and Their Sinful Sins by MacFrantic
25 Jan 2006, 11:15 AM
Cute, though wordy, title. But the poem is not cute, but sad, arguing therby with the title.
on A Book's Plight by amanda_dcosta
25 Jan 2006, 11:11 AM
Maybe you mean it as metaphor, but I doubt it. Seems an old man would ponder Jordan's River and wish he'd been read, absorbed, and written. Instead, he's just tried to make facinating and new what was neither. Elderking's recent poem is like this in feeling.
on Unfortunate Lover by elderking
25 Jan 2006, 10:41 AM
Yes, I feel it. I feel your part, or the part of your old man in the poem. "your arrival came too late" could be just "you came too late" I think. I love when I feel a poet knows what he's portraying, and I love this.