replying on Bowed by <~>
15 Oct 2002, 11:00 AM
i am humbled.
on simple silence by daniella
15 Oct 2002, 7:07 AM
beautiful and spare.
on realities <from above their brilliance is short-lived> by royalflesh
14 Oct 2002, 5:08 PM
mud has no place in my mind's eye for this unrhyme; and a mississippi sky drips right for the time, ages or aeons or eras, sublime-all those vowels long, longing sing singy-sounds.... sigh. if i looked at you with long puddle eyes that poured, would you throw me down, as a god? my eyes are grey; their color they will not divulge.
wash away the mud and tell it again. the earth stains this tale of two, and more
wash away the mud and tell it again. the earth stains this tale of two, and more
on glory bar realities by royalflesh
14 Oct 2002, 4:47 PM
post more. pretty please.i need more.
on First date (for Larry, a lesbian vampire) by Bachus
14 Oct 2002, 4:43 PM
disappointing ending. the fore had such aplomb, and then, ssslurp--over. bah. try again h. you know better than to foist this off on me. z,
on Tuesday, again and again and... by <{Baba^Yaga}>
14 Oct 2002, 4:41 PM
no. but it makes for fine lyrics. rock on, h.
on Rummage Sales by jessicazee
14 Oct 2002, 4:40 PM
fuckin A. the game is indeed on, lassie
on Child of my Buttocks by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
14 Oct 2002, 11:46 AM
'why the Browne Winds blew' or 'God goes not at all with wine!'...hard to say which i favor more. both are sheer revelation. bravo. encore.
replying on One Country by poetandknowit
14 Oct 2002, 9:15 AM
he only just finished it. you are no baby, sir. not to put words in p&k's mouth, or sweetbred or anything else in his mouth, for that matter...
on Snow-White by vulcan
14 Oct 2002, 9:10 AM
i like what you are trying to say, but you are not communicating it effectively
on A poets call to arms by INTRANSIT
14 Oct 2002, 9:07 AM
an army of thinkers. easier said than done, but it is a good fight, and i am fighting it, as are you. you just can't let on that you're after their soul right away, or that you're speaking (poetry) (shhh!!!). people are scared of poetry because they think it is beyond them. pshaw!
on Snow-White by vulcan
14 Oct 2002, 9:04 AM
and, calling it 'snow-white' conjurs disney for me. now i am not everyman, but i think you might consider the efeect the title has on the piece overall.
replying on Snow-White by vulcan
14 Oct 2002, 9:03 AM
jesus, vulcan, it just doesn't work like that. it's too archaic sounding, and doesn't come off that way at all. sorry.
replying on Snow-White by vulcan
14 Oct 2002, 8:54 AM
e) maybe if vulcan decides if the snow has made the protagonist into a snow man, or if some one has meade a snowman for the amusement of the protagonist, and conveys that more clearly; maybe if vulcan can explain how the balls of snow are balful; maybe if vulcan can explain how said protagonist is still yet moving through a storm (which generally requires a struggle) 'as Death' implies the protagonist not being dead; maybe vulcan mean he/she is doomed to walk in the snowstorm forever, and thus the use of 'sole'? have i hit on any of your main points, and if so, COULD YOU PLEASE pare the damn thing down and try NOT to be obscure? one may write worlds that taste diaphanous without occluding the vision.
on Few Words by Tom Colebrooke
14 Oct 2002, 8:41 AM
ask p&k. he's a journalist.
replying on Snow-White by vulcan
14 Oct 2002, 8:40 AM
vulcan, i have read and re-read this poem, and i do not consider myself a dense person, so i must conclude that:
a) i am not as well-read as you, and you are alluding to something i perhaps should have read, that would be the key to unlock the poem
b) the metaphor is clear in your mind, but has not translated well to the reader at large
c) i am dense
a) i am not as well-read as you, and you are alluding to something i perhaps should have read, that would be the key to unlock the poem
b) the metaphor is clear in your mind, but has not translated well to the reader at large
c) i am dense
replying on Snow-White by vulcan
14 Oct 2002, 8:29 AM
to what end? i don't get it.