"Snotty film"?

Quite excellent. Particulary liked line "sun is in your blood". Beautiful work, will review your others. Last verse excellently structured, short and sweet, a fitting epilogue. Have a ten from the UK.

If you're new to writing keep it up!

"Spicy" and "Entice me".
Hell that'll do nicely. Any rhyme like that gets my attention. Short and sweet. Simple but there's a pleasant image there. Have a nine.

Ha ha ha (Evil laugh). Sorry..here.I'll post something lighter.

Ahhh, much improved. I agree with Christof to a degree. He likes "suggestion", but I guess I'm lazy because in a poem of this length I like to have a narrative to guide me, or at least a vague understanding of what the hell's going on. I'll say nothing about "fecund" (you get away with it :) but I must say that "ejaculations" kinda jumps out at me (if you'll pardon the expression). Perhaps a touch forced. Otherwise I particularly that stanza. I'd go 8.5 if we had the halves. Mmmm...A generous 9. I find that if I have to rewrite to any significant degree, maybe it didn't come straight from the heart in the first place? Or maybe I'm just too amateur?

Look. No-one can pronounce skeleton, so the title's bang on, but unfortunately not only is the piece not original (and I really feel that's a prerequisite for using this site), but that great title doesn't seem to be yours either. (Nods to D.A.)Please...redeem yourself by posting more original work.

Ok, I see that now. We'll have to debate whether that was too cryptic or I'm just slow! I see that it works now, but, and this is the tricky bit. If a word-play/suggestion only "works" when it's been explained (nee "deciphered"), does that mean it works well or not? I'd be interested to know if anyone else understood precisely what this stanza was suggesting prior to explaination. It really is unlike me to miss pseudo-sexual references. I'm ashamed of myself.

Sometimes, even if you assemble words beautifully you don't always get a solid result. There's nothing "wrong" with this piece, but it just didn't "hit" me, as much of your other work has. Perhaps there's an over indulgence in ambiguous imagery and a shortfall of plain story telling. Guess that's just my taste. 7. (Against your other submissions).

Hmmmm...Two nines and a two, seems to be splitting the voters. Beautiful start, particularly enjoyed the juxtaposition of (what i supposed to be) the cool evening on the swing and the fire. Peaceful porch against roaring fire imagery. I'll give that bit the nine. But the political references later left me colder..."United States...". But hey, I'm British. I'll average out at a seven and check your other work.

No. I'm sorry Horus, having reviewed several of your submitions, I am sure you are capable of better writing than this. Borderline poetry, more likely poor prose. Try to concentrate more on the imagery and less on the gratuitous profanity. 1.

I don't know why i like this but i do. Probably the aquamarine architrave. Good word choice. I read this as a coming thunderstorm. (But may be wrong).8.

Somehow to obvious. ("He's done it again"). I wonder if this, worthy, subject might express itself better through a little ambiguity.5.

Needed to review your poem with lowest average to console myself. But, alas, this is rather good too. Almost too much imagery though. Slightly tiring to read. 6.

How can i like this poem so much when i don't understand a word of it? I'm just a sucker for the sun. Hell, it cheered me up. But i sense an underlying melancholy. 8.

Not big, not clever, not entertaining. Controversial is one thing, poor poetry another.

Well...if you did I'd have given you a higher score ;)

Interesting. But can tors droop?

I'm sure this brings back not so pleasant childhood memories for a lot of people. Evocative and honest.8.