Is the hot waterfall a shower? I once saw an episode of Batman where the Joker turned the city's water supply into jelly, and Commissioner Gordon unwittingly had a shower and got jelly on him.

Now look, just what's going on here. Your name is obvioulsy a cunning contraction of the name Alex Turner, otherwise known as "Burgerheart". Just who are you?

Look, no one's forcing you to sit next to people with mobile telephones.

I have the same experience before my morning dose of ketamine.

Like in "The Sixth Sense?"

Will these hands ne'er be dry?

I think such an explicit poem about rape is very insensitive. But then that's just my personal opinion.

Savory display is a totally bodacious line to end a haiku with. However, the previous lines do not do it justice. I suggest something like:

Oh, such tasty treats,
Sausage rolls and cheese pasties,
Savory display.

I think smoking is naughty, guns or otherwise.

I gave this poem a -1-, because I couldn't be bothered to scroll down the "Please Vote" menu to display the zero option.

Have you evet seen "The Fall and Rise of Reginal Perin"?

Once I went on a night out with the lads. We got so drunk that we stole a traffic cone. Can you believe it? Boy, that was a crazy night, I can tell you. Never again... ;-)

I am the master of sonnets. No one else is allowed to write them.

I always thought that poetry was wet and only for squares. I also thought that it couldn't be relevant to the youth of today. However, then I saw that you had used the phrase "mother fucker" at the end of your poem, and I realised just how wrong I had been. This really hit me hard.

I think it's a good job you copyrighted this poem, in case any poetry tycoons try to steal your work. -10-

first verse: 10
Second verse: 0
Average: 5

You have a very distinctive and individual style, which I like. I think you may enjoy some of my work (although it is sometimes misunderstood).

I think that you have missed the point somewhat. Poetry is about feelngs and emotions, not logic and computerised codes. Although this poem may be correct in its syntax, it has no real value as a representation of your inner soul.

Having read this poem, I have resolved to stop writing poetry merely for its commercial value, and also to desist in my skag habit.

I suppose you have a right to talk about these terrible events. However, they stir up horrible memories in me that I would rather forget.