on Ode to writers' block by Roisin
6 Sep 2002, 7:49 PM
poignant.
on some deleted poem
7 Sep 2002, 7:05 PM
Very poorly written. No form or imaginative use of language. Virginity is over-rated.
on some deleted poem
7 Sep 2002, 7:37 PM
Emo poem? What's that?
on More 7-Eleven holdups. by Bachus
6 Sep 2002, 7:56 PM
Perfect. You have left thirsting for more. Someones probably going to whine at you that the 4th has 8 syllables instead of 7, so you might want to change <isn't> to <ain't>. I don't give a fuck, these are perfect for a monologue. The Haiku bandit.
on Reality by ThoughtfulSoul
6 Sep 2002, 8:39 PM
Yes, you're right, god is a figment of your torn imagination. So is everything else. Take some serotonin re-uptake inhibitors. You'll feel loads better. Though they might interfere with your so- called talent.
on Self by ThoughtfulSoul
6 Sep 2002, 8:53 PM
Things are not quenched for, they are quenched by. Here's a small nugget of wisdom you can take with you on your quest for enlightenment: Many people will incourage you by telling you your poetry is good. They are lying.
on Pleasurable Agony by crims0ngh0st
6 Sep 2002, 9:04 PM
The antithesis of erotica. Who needs Keigels, after reading this my vagina squeezed shut.
on some deleted poem
6 Sep 2002, 9:47 PM
excessively showy. The images you create are conspicious with their vulgar display of adjectives.
on Celebration by unknown
6 Sep 2002, 9:18 PM
Forget the last stanza it's totally useless. Everything contained within it is implied in the rest of the poem. How about "I kissed from your breasts" "the down of your thighs"
on Waiting by itchiwitch
6 Sep 2002, 7:42 PM
Remove the last 2 lines. They turn this sappy poem into a late night talk show intro.
on Thoughtless Deed by craiggiarc1971
6 Sep 2002, 7:48 PM
Really awful, and pregnant with bad grammaticals.
on Contra Mundum by psychedelic
5 Sep 2002, 11:04 PM
gate/fate true/blue and of course the ever popular love/above.
on He loves me by susie
5 Sep 2002, 11:42 PM
thisd poem is absolutely beautiful.
on Celebration by unknown
5 Sep 2002, 10:46 PM
Yeah it needs some editing, but "copper taste of blood" and "naked scalp breathed cinnamon are first rate. Thanks for your concern Mr. Longfellows, but I am single because I'm not married not because I'm alone.
on Celebration by unknown
5 Sep 2002, 10:51 PM
I don't think Fabio would place his face anywhere near her deep smelling open sex. He might kiss heaving breasts but nothing with the copper taste of blood. Did you have to mention Fabio? Now the whole image is ruined for me.
on some deleted poem
5 Sep 2002, 10:57 PM
There is no poetry here. I searched. I used a flashlight and some tweezers. No poetry.
on finally found you by webguy
5 Sep 2002, 11:01 PM
Cherry handles?
on Celebration by unknown
5 Sep 2002, 10:22 PM
Wow. There certainly has been alot of erotica coming up on random recently. This is uncomfortably arousing. Well developed ambience. Sight, sound, taste, smell, touch. The last stanza doesn't live up to the others.
on Perfect Love by snowing
6 Sep 2002, 10:10 PM
What makes this a poem? Please explain.