on some deleted poem
2 Feb 2003, 4:23 PM
Most amazing poem ever, except the last line ruins everything.
on Run Forest! Run... by Bachus
2 Feb 2003, 9:33 PM
Daring! Original! Creative!
on I Am a Snob, or, 'A Definition' by JakeBike
2 Feb 2003, 10:26 AM
and don't forget writer of triangle poems!!!
on some deleted poem
2 Feb 2003, 9:40 PM
Daring. Innovative. Cutting edge.
on Beauty, sleeping by Ranger
2 Feb 2003, 10:01 PM
Oh my god! How could I have ever of doubted you! This is superb. Genius. As horus8 says: Brave. Just brave. I am humbled here on a Sunday night watching snow fall outside my window. Grim one and Grim two would dare call this: provocative, cunning, heart felt. You will go far in your writing career. I now have no doubt. Congratulations, Mr Ranger. You win!!!
on unsent by Bill Z Bub
2 Feb 2003, 9:47 PM
I know you probably want this a tad abstract, but I think if you were a bit more in touch with the setting and created more specific images it would be more powerful overall. Not that this isn't a decent effort. There are some nice ideas behind the words but I think you could try to strengthen your metaphor. You did a nice job extending it, but if you threw some more specifics in for clarity, I think you would have a good piece. I was just waiting the whole poem to get that tingling in my lower back and it just never materialized. Damn.
on Cant sleep, clown will eat me.(A poem about clowns) by lunar
2 Feb 2003, 9:35 PM
Do you ever lie awake at night and wonder aloud to god why he gave me such great talent and you so little? Do you ever wonder about that just before you go to sleep, when you can feel yourself start to drift and are still conscious enough to make the choice of whether to give in to the drift or fight? Like a preview of dying. Is that what you mean here. Is it raining in Liverpool today?
on The Kansas City Chiefs suck by Jeremi B. Handrinos
2 Feb 2003, 9:11 PM
No sweetie, not a ladder, a resume. Thanks for the poem. See you soon. Stay out of trouble.
on Hermes Trigamestus (was not a monk edit) by Jeremi B. Handrinos
2 Feb 2003, 5:31 PM
I think Shardick is your weakest character yet.
on some deleted poem
2 Feb 2003, 5:30 PM
This made my lower back tingle. I want you! This instant!
on Savior Self by OneFingerAnswer
2 Feb 2003, 5:28 PM
I would rather read 100 well written poems than just one of your lyrics or poems. I find it interesting the narrow mind you have when it comes to poetry. Maybe it is because you are gay.
You sir, are the worst excuse for a pimple poet on this site! Can you really expect anyone over 16 to take you seriously as a writer? Well, minus DA. Do you expect praise from the poets of my stature? I mean, come on. Read this aloud with out laughing and I will buy you a pint!
on One Moment to the Other (v2) by nentwined
2 Feb 2003, 4:57 PM
Does using word varations like temp'ry, mem'ry, 'tis make a poem more poetic?
on Summer by MaliqaTara
2 Feb 2003, 4:27 PM
"I dont really care what people think about my writing, but if another, I feel, decent poet from this site constructively criticized my work, I might pay attention." Do you know how many people say this yet still post there work here? If you do not care what people think then you would not post a poem. This poem has some exceptionally nice cliches in it. My favorite is "whisper in the dark."
on I Am a Snob, or, 'A Definition' by JakeBike
2 Feb 2003, 10:25 AM
Blade is just a mindless brit popper. He is trying to be stupid so remove him. But add Range and put Cadacus back on there!!!!! And DA for his abundance of ass pimples!!! And God's Wife for that Raven poem!!
on some deleted poem
2 Feb 2003, 5:39 PM
Do you ever send your poems to magazines?
on Cloak Of Love by brokenwing
2 Feb 2003, 4:59 PM
BEST POEM EVER!!!!!
on flight (a poem written in high school) by Bill Z Bub
2 Feb 2003, 9:25 PM
Good thing you wrote this in high school. Of course, your writing hasn't changed all that much, eh? Good try!!
on Love spank by Shardik
2 Feb 2003, 9:51 PM
Provocative! Sexy! Intrepid!