where da white womens be at???

excellent cockrings and machineguns...staccato whispers.

I cannot imagine what one could find ambiguous about this poem.

my god, child. have you read this aloud?

anew again?

sour knife?

cut off the first half

crickets chirping

well. this poem...not so good. but your screen name is the best i have seen...perfect, diamond brilliance.
10

i laughed. I cried...mostly cried. then i began to vomit

i still do not understand why sung and not sang.

i am not entirely sure, but i don't think that the word "loom" can be used as a transitive verb. perhaps move the word loom to the first line or use a comma.

this goes well with part 2, and is pretty good, and even a bit funny.

lions could use an apostrophe

let me be the first to say "davinguff"

sentence structure is a major, crucial element in all writing, including free verse, prose and even some grocery lists.

the worthwhile writer takes his potential audience into consideration, and tries to structure sentences in a way that makes them understandable to that audience.

I think the poem is pretty good, though it feels like a preach in parts. this is unsavory.

problems that dwell in our world???

i do think "faltered ego" could be better stated. more clear.

"her foot servants too"

what is with all the low votes here?

i think confined to an air of vanity is quite a good line.

and we sang to her

i think this poem is excellent

i would give you a 10, but since you already have a 3....i think shooting for the worst list is a better option. blob on.

Bob Sagat blowing Jung

an attenuated strip of cheese graffiti on the side of an ass dumpster

there is something catchy and appealing about this.

for you and I?????