Kewl.

“having the usual?” good. now if you turned the church into a bar, you sir, would be a fucking brilliant bastard.. but you fell short.. tsk. 7.

And eviction. but for your age attempting a vilanelle is brave and noteworthy, congratulations, but you spell for shit.

Dreamer, I liked this! Is this guy a private in the army who comes from West Virginia? Best fucking killers are always rebels. They've got the most balls and instinctively know when to strike their prey. Thier a bitch to control and manage, but they get the fucking job done! "You see shooting squirrels......" is a great fucking verse! Nice Job -9-

Get rid of stupid bitch. Otherwise the best thing you've written. Seriously. Oh, and it's "your life in ruins" How about "Everybody's bound to meet their fate"? You hold your rythmn and don't let go. It's all grown-up.

in the meantime I'll keep typing to amuse myself and unload some baggage maybe I'll stumble over perfection on the way **************** That sums up what I've been reading in editors notes lately. A lot of editors say that poetry is getting longer and dragging on with everyone typing this day and age. Its just so easy for them to keep typing and typing I've found it to be true. Its all to easy to just keep going. It was never like that when I was hand writing everything. I believe the poem would say as much if not more taking the lines from above totally out of it. Or maybe... In the meantime I'll keep working towards perfection, Perhaps stumble upon it along the way.

chaos is the only pefection the universe knows. To organize lawfully in order to destroy repeatedly.

wtf? really? ;/ that is very sad to hear.. and leaves me, a man of words with very little of any value to say.

Perfect, but change 'stares' to 'stare', that way the line stands alone like all your others.

Condolences to you my love. Things like these are bound to happen, everything is all fucked-up.

The body rules the mind, don't fool yourself.

The first step is to include an ASCII pickle.

I have already written the perfect poem. Maybe you might be able to write the second best poem or something.

Curse you and your knowledge of measuring devices.

I find this "poem" purile, and unbecoming of this illustrious site.

ok, Mr "Wordsmith.." just one thing: assumtion should be assumption tsk. nice title. heres an 8.

I couldn't read it all. But from what I saw of it I'll give you an 8. Some great thoughts and views in what I did read.

It almost seems to be more of a rant. But it works, and some of the things are so off the wall. I love it.

You are way ahead of your time. for a fifteen year old, this is a remarkable piece.

I like it!