Yeah, you're a nerd. "Bandgeek" wipes his poo-less ass with guys like you. It is kind of like Ben Fold's "Rockin the Suburbs"- he's one angry dwarf.

Seems incomplete, and a little redundant. What else about the musician and her? Tell her those calloused guitar player hands have "compromised" qualities in the sack.

This is just begging for a re-explanation of your elusive screen name by supremedreamer.

I think if you called it, A Letter to Hustler Magazine, it would work. A comburesome poem. If this really happened then try to write with the erotizism you felt. If you made this up then ditch it intil you have a real lowdown nasty experience then take that nasty feeling and write with it, because right now it's too long and unsexy.

A good effort but it doesn't rhyme very well. Keep working at it, though! You'll get there!

hmm.... nice imagery i can't wait for more

deserves to be at #1, good job!

A nicely done romantic image, hare. As far as suggestions, I would consider replacing the first line of this poem. You assume first off that the reader is shallow and unromantic and then proceed to give a romantic description hoping the reader will understand it. I do like how in showing this picture to a visitor you get sucked into it and eventually forget your visitor completely, asking, "Do you remember..." obviously you aren't talking to the visitor because the visitor has never met this woman. It gives the feeling of a senile old man who has seen this picture and got lost in it and never returned to the realization that someone is sitting with him. In this way it is not only an interesting sentimental poem but also a description of age.

oh wow the first part blew me away

That was good. I knew it was a bathroom at first, because of the word "relieve"- but then I thought maybe it was someone going to confession. I don't know if you did that on purpose, but confession/public restroom ambiguity works for me.

two n's in perennial. Line 4 is combining two phrases that don't really belong together, is there a way you could locate "but failed to open" with the previous verse, and the "rich soil of it's birth" with the following verse without ruining the handsome shape of the poem? I liked the ending.

Could use a little more description and fewer of these undefineable constructs. Like, give an example of the suspicious partner's reaction to the narrator talking to someone else, rather than "And you class infidelity as even talking to someone, Do you think I’d just fuck the first girl who’d pout," Instead of asking the partner that question, say what the partner WOULD think, in the narrator's opinion.

I like the way this bursts out, without any interrupting line breaks or unneccesary punctuation, like you said it all in one breath.

I liked this part "I smoke, water resistant to your proposals to enter me and live your desire for a baby is transparent" but think it could use some punctuation or a line break (contrary to my last comment on your other poem) to make these (and others) distinct, separate phrases.

I think your emotions need to be clarified - are you nostalgic, horny, guilty, I can't relate to what you're feeling unless I know what emotions you're experiencing. Or is that the whole point? The confusion? No judgement meant to your situation, but, if you're bored or unsatified in your relationship, don't think that cheating will help the sitution!

-like "slabs lay scattered, defeated"; like reference to "childself," although could use more explanation; this poem depresses me a little bit, however, when it's over I want more - say more about the warmer tide fighting to escape from under the ice - the last two lines seem to get smothered under the "layers of ice."

this poem to me is everything that is wrong with the world

Why is Winnie Mandela your chosen victim? I think you need a dash between pre and cum to make it easier to read.

I liked the papercuts and stabbing, and the "love poems less about passion/ more about nothing." Good job.

I wrote this for my best friend on her 18th birthday.