I don't care that this is sacreligious, it is crap any way you look at it. nice job.

the limitations are what force the discipline and that is the essence of the Haiku form--beauty through discipline. "sometimes an apparent constraint can serve to free the imagination" - Theodore Roethke

definitely different. fun-ny.

Don't go, Doug. We need more people like you on this site who take things seriously, not less. And your George Bush limericks were excellent.

Doug, come back. This reminds me a little in style of the mighty Hugh MacDiarmid, although not in content (he was a militant communist). It is a densely packed, intelligent poem, desperately striving against its own limitations to find salvation. Needs more work, but well done.

I used to be in love with the trapezoid myself, until i discovered the tetrahedron.

strangely un-haiku like.

3 7 5

? I didn't know starfish ate cherries.

5 6 3 mekka lekka hi mekka heiny ho.

4 8 3 are you counting the title as part of 17 syllables?

Sonnets are a bitch. start with a rhyme scheme, abd go from there. check out www.sonnets.org

Good job Jess. Alittle more serious than others you've written. Say, I've been looking for an open mic spot in Milwaukee, ain't found one yet. you?

This is pretty charmless even by the standards of your oeuvre.

Read it aloud to yourself and grind off the speed bumps. They're small but will make it better to read.

I think this tries a little to hard to achieve its effects. The attempt to mix poignant images with a harder edge doesn't quite come off, but I like it anyway. And insomnia is fucking awful. You get to the point you're scared of going to bed because you think you won't get to sleep.

This one time I'm saying: over the top. too much. repetetively twisted. Honestly, cut it back. or don't. wash your car with it.

too many syllables.Nice, but too many syllables.

T R I T E

If you actually wrote this yourself, bravo. if not, then shame on you for defacating on art.