richa
on some deleted poem
23 May 2003, 10:10 AM
quite good, I like the contemporary setting
hey I get it.
do dead hamsters sit?
boing.
how many syllables are there in "Yggdrasil"? how does that work? is it one per vowel phenome?
cute haiku
always like the vast spectrum of language
Anger and abuse are common this not so
ending in "at" adds an urban/hilbilly feel to this that ia am guessing you didn't intend. perhaps another adjective such as "warm" or "wool" or somehting...before the word "gloves"
Personal Computer? Political Correctness? Parrot Cooties? Pistachio Cookies? Parking Center? Perineum Cutting? (the last is the best)
for thse who don't know:
perineum: The portion of the body in the pelvis occupied by urogenital passages and the rectum, bounded in front by the pubic arch, in the back by the coccyx, and laterally by part of the hipbone.
The region between the scrotum and the anus in males, and between the posterior vulva junction and the anus in females
HOW DOES THIS GET TO THE FRONT OF THE QUEUE OF "MOST RECENT POEMS" ON 21 MAY 2003 WHEN IT WAS WRITTEN ND POSTED ON 7 MARCH 2003? IT'S BEYOND COMPREHENSION
........................................
5
12
3
?
freeform?
maybe liquid concrete. I suggest boning up on the classifications of poetry. this, and the other, are freeform.
how would you know hoe much money was owed if you forgot them? nice paradox.
The question before you is, do you rate the poem high or low? Zero or Ten? The thing of it is, though: the choice has already been made for you. You just have to understand WHY you will make that choice.
In conclusion, Monica Belucci has nice cleavage and I TOOK THE PURPLE PILL!
Sincerely,
Mr. Anderson
line 1 and two rhyming is a distraction. haiku 2 and three are freakin' awesome, worth a doubloon apeice.
Haiku
The haiku is a japanese poetry form, evolved from the renga during the 16th century. It is a three line, unrhymed set of seventeed syllables (5-7-5).
It is typically a pair of contrasting concrete/sensory images, with each image so dependant on the other that the whole thing collapses if one word is altered.
this is neither good nor a haiku. maple syrup on sugar on a pile of trite pancakes.
you have a sense for words, try a different topic. Not all poetry is love and flowers. push yourself. this is also not haiku.
9 for the second one. lose the titles.
very warner brothers. nicely done.
a lot of stuff covered
I quite liked the middle its rhyming sped it up
inspired by subterranian homesick blues?