| regarding some deleted poem... |
dancin_n_da_moonlite 152.163.100.135 |
10-Mar-05/1:59 PM |
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i really like this - though i cannot say i entirely relate
-megan
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| Re: Apostrophetic Loss by Dovina |
richa 81.178.193.41 |
10-Mar-05/2:16 PM |
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I think you need to stop being so angry. The anger in this poem is the worst type of anger, dull anger. All this talk of in-crowd and rules, dull, dull, dull and the least said about the ending the better. The first verse was quite well constructed I thought, the poem did lose its discipline afterwards though.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
dancin_n_da_moonlite 152.163.100.135 |
10-Mar-05/2:17 PM |
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not your best work, i don't feel
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
dancin_n_da_moonlite 152.163.100.135 |
10-Mar-05/2:19 PM |
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i really like this - and this is one of the few rhymed poems i have read that i actually enjoyed!
- 9 -
-megan
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
dancin_n_da_moonlite 152.163.100.135 |
10-Mar-05/2:21 PM |
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i really like this - not quite sure what it is but it grabs me
the end is especially good - 10 -
-megan
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
dancin_n_da_moonlite 152.163.100.135 |
10-Mar-05/2:25 PM |
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
dancin_n_da_moonlite 152.163.100.135 |
10-Mar-05/2:26 PM |
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i truly enjoyed this
-megan
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| Re: Alone by frdup717 |
-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 81.153.196.50 |
10-Mar-05/5:21 PM |
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What sort of generic claptrap do you call this? How dare you sully the mantle with such a dumpling? Go away and don't come back until you've actually come up with an idea. This is a non-poeme. -10-
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
dancin_n_da_moonlite 152.163.100.135 |
10-Mar-05/2:28 PM |
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to be honest i dont have any good idea what this is about, but it sounds so nice when i read (the flow of the words, not nescesarily there meanings) that i love it anyway
-megan
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
dancin_n_da_moonlite 152.163.100.135 |
10-Mar-05/2:31 PM |
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not your best work - 6 -
-megan
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| Re: To those that would teach poetry by INTRANSIT |
richa 81.178.193.41 |
10-Mar-05/2:32 PM |
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I'm having a bit of trouble with the metaphor here. The teacher is metaphorically holding a pistol to your head by forcing you to write. 'And then I would forge you a sword to be used against me later.' It is unclear why the effect of holding a pistol to your head would 'forge a sword' or how that sword could be used against you. The end is fine, although I missed that you wanted pushing to write first time (it seemed unexpected).
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
dancin_n_da_moonlite 152.163.100.135 |
10-Mar-05/2:36 PM |
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i really like this - i am usually not a fan of sonnets or rhyme for that matter but this has a strange allure
-megan
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
dancin_n_da_moonlite 152.163.100.135 |
10-Mar-05/2:37 PM |
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i enjoyed this alot
-megan
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| Re: Nonchalantly by Plaidypus |
richa 81.178.193.41 |
10-Mar-05/2:40 PM |
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Shock endings involving tragic illness, death, are not my bag, they lack subtlety. I would also suggest that the quoted bit is made less clunky to sound more like natural speech.
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| Re: Subtle Reasons by crooked_smile |
richa 81.178.193.41 |
10-Mar-05/2:47 PM |
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That's pretty much it. God is strong, infallible, doesn't wear shoes, male. Nature is nurturing and female. Not exactly subtle though. It merely reflects beliefs held as our language evolved.
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| Re: Moses by Dovina |
dancin_n_da_moonlite 152.163.100.135 |
10-Mar-05/2:48 PM |
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i really like this
-megan
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199 |
11-Mar-05/6:23 AM |
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A - Age you got your first kiss: 6, a strange man at scout camp, I had to kiss him back but not on the lips.
C - Crush: Superman
D - Dad's name: ?
E - Easiest person to talk to: The Lord, Jesus Christ
F - Favorite band at the moment: Hanson, there is and never will be another.
G - Gummy worms or gummy bears? Gummy bears give great head, gummy worms sounds revolting.
H - Hometown: Ashby-de-la-zouch
I - Instruments: Phallus
J- Junior High: 6 in three hours
K - Kids: Aids
M - Mom's name: Patricia Lane.
N - Nicknames: The Twat.
Q - Quotation: "Christ's fat cock, how I ache for you."--attrib.-=Dark_Angel=-P.I.
R - Reason to smile: Doing a Mexican wave at the Tsunami benefit match.
S - Song you sang last: "You have our flag in your flag" to an Australian at the rugby.
T - Time you woke up: 5:30 am to throw up.
U - Unknown fact about me: Disabled from waist up.
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| Re: Questions for CLS by wFraser Allonby Q.C.w |
Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199 |
11-Mar-05/6:24 AM |
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| Re: Oceans love song by Stacy Stewart |
Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199 |
11-Mar-05/7:33 AM |
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line 4: change gentle to genital and I will upgrade my 0 to a 2.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
wFraser Allonby Q.C.w 195.157.153.249 |
11-Mar-05/7:41 AM |
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