regarding some deleted poem...	electroman1979 198.81.26.16	12-Jul-04/12:45 AM
this poem lacks taste
regarding some deleted poem...	SupremeDreamer 204.31.164.5	12-Jul-04/10:49 PM
Smashin, but I think the last word in the last line should be 'fleeting' instead of "fleet". Other than that lil nitpick, it's solid. Blessed with ten.
Re: Zin/Enough/Things/Squeeze/Flow by gregsamsa222	SupremeDreamer 204.31.170.34	13-Jul-04/2:04 AM
Brilliant. Love the build up.. Blessed with ten.
Re: The Spaz by ?-Dave_Mysterious-?	Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199	13-Jul-04/2:54 AM
Splendid. This is the best poeme about Spags ever.
regarding some deleted poem...	Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199	13-Jul-04/5:49 AM
I hope you all like it - it took me three and half weeks to choose the word and a further three and half weeks to judge the positioning. Having invested so much into this poem I have been left as deflated as a Sudanese breast so any words of praise or polite criticism would really help to reinflate my sagging, droopy mamms.
regarding some deleted poem...	patty t 24.156.158.81	13-Jul-04/5:53 AM
i like it except you misspelled QUIDDITCH
Re: Desperation by gavinduff	?-Dave_Mysterious-? 80.42.122.216	12-Jul-04/9:23 AM
hi. i realy like your poem!!!1
Re: A Girl’s Climax by Dovina	Dan garcia-Black 66.159.205.139	13-Jul-04/6:24 AM
I like everything butt the end. To avoid all the ambiguity, it should read: After all the dieting, Makeup, Fashion, Poise, He finally noticed, He was fat and gay.
Re: Zin/Enough/Things/Squeeze/Flow by gregsamsa222	-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 81.86.113.159	12-Jul-04/4:22 PM
I like the way you've crammed several poemes into one submission. It allows the reader to sort of rank your entire life in one go. -6-
Re: Zin/Enough/Things/Squeeze/Flow by gregsamsa222	Dovina 24.52.157.176	12-Jul-04/10:17 AM
Too long, couldn't get through it, sorry
regarding some deleted poem...	wilco 66.162.22.123	12-Jul-04/12:03 PM
I talked to Jesus the other day. He's pissed because Leno just keeps on sucking. The poem..a little simplistic from you. I guess I'm just expecting more.
Re: A Girl’s Climax by Dovina	edpeterson 68.79.6.59	12-Jul-04/5:00 AM
I cannot imagine what one could find ambiguous about this poem.
Re: Zin/Enough/Things/Squeeze/Flow by gregsamsa222	Dovina 24.52.157.176	12-Jul-04/10:58 AM
The last section "Flow" is absolutely great. I wonder why you placed the three days after death in reverse order. They seem better chronologically. I see the year before death as good at the end though. Why the indented form on just one section? And the long lines in just one section? It seems better to hold the short-line form throughout. You will not receive the attention you deserve on poemranker with poems this long. The last section, in particular, could stand alone. "He clutched it by the throat,"
Re: Vows by QuirkyWonder	Dovina 24.52.157.176	12-Jul-04/10:19 AM
The last three lines don't make sense. cliches abound. Try for originality.
Re: no email, no world by Prince of Void	wilco 66.162.22.123	12-Jul-04/12:22 PM
Is this written in English?
Re: Vows by QuirkyWonder	Dan garcia-Black 66.159.232.120	12-Jul-04/10:52 AM
I see something in this. The image is obscured by your immersion in the material. I think EP said it best, "Put the pen down. Back away from the paper..." Go to a coffee shop and listen to the people talking. Listen to what cashiers and ticket takers at the theater say to you. Hear the way people talk to each other when they think someone else is listening THEN come back and re-write this good idea you have. Just one thing...avoid all those stupid inanities that people use in their daily speech. Your good idea deserves more respect than the day to day parlance people use at the supermarket unless that voice is an integral part to our understanding of the poem. Don’t stop writing. Don’t be discouraged by comments on poemranker. Take what you can use and make your stuff better. I see something in there but it needs your help to get it into focus.
Re: All Alone by pinay_miss_azn	?-Dave_Mysterious-? 80.42.112.88	12-Jul-04/4:00 PM
Hey, this is really great!!1 It reminds me of my new poem. Can I make a suggestion? I reckon "perchance" would be better as "peradventure."
Re: Zin/Enough/Things/Squeeze/Flow by gregsamsa222	?-Dave_Mysterious-? 80.42.112.88	12-Jul-04/4:05 PM
My favorite bit is : A shoe-string, dear? Bright red. Short It cannot be for an adult’s shoe. Genius
Re: Vows by QuirkyWonder	-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 81.86.113.159	12-Jul-04/4:21 AM
"Nothing is forever Because forever always ends" I am imagining the look of quiet satisfaction on your face when you came up with that sodden fuckmuffin, and frantically tightening a vise on my remaining teste to take away the discomfort.
regarding some deleted poem...	edpeterson 68.79.6.59	12-Jul-04/4:57 AM
well...i think the poem is average. but you should get many 10s from god's children