Excessive explanation of poem: 'Now That's What I Call Music' is a long running series of chart hit compilations. They come out regularly and are full of rubbish, though I have a fondness for one my brother had which included '99 Red Balloons' by Nena. In some sense they are stuck because they always include the same type of disposable pop music. But then they always reflect the period in which they come out so they are to some extent always different. On the other hand, I like music which deliberately sounds like the CD is stuck. An example of this is 'The Dance', first track on The Music's eponymous debut album. So the poem is a juxtaposition of these two possible readings. Paradoxically making a sound like a stuck CD is a fairly progressive thing to do (exploding traditional notions of music) where chart compilations are not. Think about it.

What have golf clubs got to do with anything?

That's just because there weren't any straightjackets then.. are you then afraid, dear lady, that you are a monster as well.. glad to see you are alive, always a pleasure..

They wouldn't really be rules unless there were some system in place to punish people for breaking them, would they? I'm afraid you've failed again, bud. Big time.

Nope.

Not true. Santa Clause is right over there.