richa
on Jonquils, daffydils by fevriere
24 Feb 2004, 8:28 AM
What white temple, if you are to use paris, I would suggest make some reference other than it is paris.
Other than that cute, like knocking themselves dizzy
Flows quite well in an older-world way.
On 13th Feb jasondingus credited 'your' poeme with an -10-. From 13th Feb to 23rd Feb you balmilised yourself in that -10-, basking in its splendour and revelling in the credit you took from it. Unless you can prove that you gain'd no pleasure from that vote before your admission of the 'borrowed' 1st verse on 23rd Feb, I'm afraid your jodhpurs will remain at half-mast. A belated admission of guilt simply will not do, since it is like stealing some money but only apologising after you have squander'd it on a vast collection of antique digital watches and Thundercats quilts. -10-
I never intended to pass all this poem off as my own, hence the admission (I wasn't exactly ridden with guilt, shaking and sweating fearing God's wrath). Just because I didn't chose to use quotation marks doesn't mean its plagiarism all of a sudden. To plagiarise:'' to use another person's idea or a part of their work and pretend that it is your own'', freeserve online dictionary, ''to take and use as one's own, the thoughts, writings or inventions of another'' - Shorter Oxford English Dictionary, ''to take ideas writings, etc. from another and pass them off as one's own'' - Collins Concise English Dictionary. Now how does that relate to this phrase quoted from above? '' the first stanza is not mine...I cannot take credit for it''. I have not, do not and will not take credit for the first stanza, so how can I be plagiarising when the definition is to pass off other's works as my own? Regardless of what punctuation devices are used in the body of the poem. Cock.
-10-
Do you have anything good to say to anyone?
Thanks Horus! lol
I capitalized Gone because I thought it would put more of a punch on the ending? I'm just beginning and trying new things. I'm open to ideas.
somemorecommas or something in stanza three would be nice - it kindof just keeps going.
I feel like there is something deep here, and I like it, but the flow is distracting me.
Verry sweeet. Touching without a trace of sappiness - surprised myself at the reaction.
well done.
I'm going to suggest, despite my liking it very much, that you replace "summer" with something more specific (either a particular day or a month). My immediate reaction was "overused word" - but you quickly pulled me into the body to forget.
I'd rather some examples than a list of options. From this information could could make a good poem.
Some weaknesses would add interest (otherwise the reader becomes jealous and spiteful).
second to last stanza is what yer shootin fer - the rest leaves me nothing to imagine.
something with less finality at the end I think would do wonders for this. Something more poignant.
I like the use of repetition.
cute
I think the comparison between woodwork and nightmare needs to be more elaborate.
If it works it would be ace, but at the moment I am not getting it.
Rewrite this from the perspective of a lobster. [8 marks]
<Sigh...>
Still plagiarism. a) you take credit by not using quotes or otherwise explicitly giving credit to its author within the text of the poem. b) if I reposted this entire poem with only the single line added at the end "in a sweatshirt with a drawstring hood", I could not reasonably call it my own. Cock. I blame you.
erm, no, cos I don't take the credit, and its not an entire poem passed off as my own. Cock. And the strife/life isn't mine, blame Frances Cornford.
You have no command over your disobedient words. The old couples in the adjoining apartments hear them screeching all day for sugar-teats while you chain-smoke Virginia Slims 100s on your chintz-pattern couch, watch your "stories" and ignore them entirely. People like you, they mutter in the halls, have no right to words... Somebody oughta call the law on you...