er...cleverdevice...it's only a dream certaintly should have an apostrophe. It's a contraction of "it is." And you forgot to mention that "tomorrow" is spelled wrong. :D Not a bad poem, though, clumsey.

Not bad. Good imagery. Too many commas in S2.

This one's too generic, too. It needs to "show" more in order to back up what you're trying to say with it and "tell" less, unless you can tell it with more originality than that.

Way too generic. This could be a Hallmark card. And probably should be.

I like this poem. Although I don't feel like it really gets going until Stanza 5, which is my favorite, along with the ending stanza. The repetition of together etc. works really well in this piece.

This is great. I really like this poem. A very bold concept, written well. Nice job!

This is well-written (in an English/word usage kinda way). Personally, being into more contemporary type stuff, the content just doesn't do anything for me. But that's just personal preference, not really anything against your writing.

This isn't bad. Of course, "lonely hearts" could be accused of being sort of a cliched phrase, and topic, but I kinda like what you did with it. Typo on lonely in L2, and I also think, in the same line, you could use a much more unique word than "smiles." "Hope at seventy beats per minute" is one of my favorite lines, as is "I flatline at midnight." I don't think you need to repeat lonely hearts at the end. Use something that implies it rather than outright saying it again.

Not bad, either. It's pretty well written. For some reason, it's just not inspiring the emotion I think it's supposed to though. I'm kinda neutral on this one.

This is alright. The rhythm's good. But it's kind of...I don't know. Too generic, overall. I get no real vibe on the "I" or "you" portrayed here. They're kinda just cardboard cutouts. There's nothing that really gives you a unique voice. Oh, and "your looking" should be "you're looking"

It does seem a little disjointed. But I kinda like it. At first, "Some snow cold bird" sounded a little awkward to me. I dunno, it could probably be fixed just by adding a hypen (snow-cold). I really like the line "Like that day the rain dog shivered."

Actually, this is quite good for the most part. "Flood the land with gentle take over" is not. I can do without "forlornly" and "little" in this context. I think it's still deserving of a nine though - nice job.

A good synthesis and gently embedded rhymes - but I can't decide if it's too long or too short...

It's quite close to something good but it's kept back a bit, i think, by some of the rhymes and that last part where disguise is repeated - somehow gets difficult there. I'd say worth re-working a bit.

"Forever beckoned beyond the mists. But lost, between the worlds adrift." - this is the weakest part. Fix that up. Some of the antiquated diction might stand to be toned down, even for what you're trying to do. 9.

I like it but feel after 2 readings that there is a small suggestion....add the word time after night in 8th line...flow would be smoother

we've all been there once