Did you read about the bishop in Phoenix, Arizona? Hit and run, drunk, (pedestrian) left the body there and went home with a shattered windshield...Coincidentaly, he was one of the kiddy foddler priests indicted last year, YES! Moments like these baby I just lick my lips red.

Some really intense sections, but then you fumble, and on top of that it's fat, no sweat, all of my early work was fat too, better fat that skin for the winter is what I say, but an important point I can help you with here is try not to allow synthetic hate to warp your ideas, in other words, hate what you know for sure, then apply that to what you want and imagine thematicly, not vice versa, otherwise it comes out on the paper sounding like a flat can of cheese wiz and contrived. I see much promise here though, I want you to know that.

A wolf in sheeps clothing. sucker, but a brilliant pimple poem none the less have siete and shoe

"then had a fit" change to "then had a salad" for some reson I would of just died upon reading that, but that just me, this is a point for our side for sure, nice one. Did I tell you about the time in my "who I'd like to thank letter" to poetry.com I actually wrote in "bigbrother bullshit publishing companys that actually have the nerve to put together compendiums of poetry, basically, destroying the identity of the poets to the poems of the masses.", and do you know what? Those motherfuckers are so out to lunch, they printed it.

"in ) = ( * ^^ @ # > | ) = // &" with "in the reptile section" maybe even change "in " to "from".

a fairly standard structure but i enjoyes this try to lose mentioning a 50 yr old man twice

Shorten my boy and end it at the line of the politician. You are spending far too much time on the loo and I do hope you have learned to put the seat down now. 8

Some parts were quite the shot game, it will come my boy, it will come. 7

lycanthropic being wierwolf i'm glad i realised

cute

a bit didactic and part of the end verse was far too 'ricki lake' but some good parts second verse is thought provoking but perhaps a bit clumsy

a couple of nice beat esque bits 'like we believe in a politician' and asterisk.... the end doesn't need to be so definitive though

Thought this was brilliant, I love line 2 its original. Your an interesting character I either love your stuff or hate it and you've said a couple of negative things about me in the past but fuck it we don't have to like each other. I feel I am improving as a writer, more experimental and I believe you must selectively read the good and ignore the bad and let it inspire you. What about you ? By the way my brother's gone AWOL last I heard he was state side. Great poem - seriously. a rare 10

Will i be handsome, will i be rich, here's what she said to me, kay sara, sara, whatever will be, will be the futures not ours to see, kay sara sara. Is this a sequel if it is then cor blimey its great?

Didn't like it ! to much will i this and made me not care about living. 3

Change line 10 to Twas about the time' I think it adds a bit more garlic to the salt the pygmies used. Pretty funny 8 :-)

This could also be titled 'A Relationship' 7 Nice shorts by the way.

This is great, and oh so true. ^_^

Good work.