Bachus
on âDeath To Doughboyâ by The Martyr
10 May 2003, 11:40 AM
At least this had a point, and I can dig that, but your others fucking suck. 7.
You can't spell, punctuate or use grammar correctly either, you fucking retard. In fact I believe the only good thing you've ever done is use the phrase "a homerun of shit".
That makes the two of us.
I don't think three of your poems are shit. I believe all of them to be shit. Whether you are twelve or 32 or ten, 6, 600. It's irrelevant, because, you can't spell, your poetry is pointlessly self absorbed and ridiculous, your grammar is shite! And beyond all of that you have no grasp of poetry, art, or what it is you're trying to spit out of that void between your ears called the human mind. Congradulations, I hope you can skate for a day job?
possibly needs to be shorter
I feel like i've been commandeered to listen to someone tell me their broken heart story when i want to watch the football
A few cute little references though, i'm sure if i read again i'll find a few more
this is ok
gently amusing without recourse to the usual 'funny' issues written about on here
''a homerun of shit'' is some of what you said to me and i am tired of your bullshit bachus I may not be as good of a writer or maybe not even half of a good writer that you may be but i am damn well certain of one thing, i dont like to be told that my poems are shit i would rather have it in a ranking rather than in words. I came to poemranker because i thought 'hey since im ONLY 12 and have nothing better to do why not enter my poems for rankings?' But as it turns out i would be hated by many so called poem wrietrs such as yourself. I try to deal with it, but since my in-matureness seems to control everything i am going to handle it the way i see fit. I would normally just cuss you out like any other normail 12 year old kid but i am not going to stoop to your level of using mean comments.(maybe i will) As your title says, the boy who shot birds, I wish it had been the birds who shot boys. You deserve every bit of what i am very pathetically trying to tell you. I think you are shit for telling me that and if i may say it just once more: My poems i like to call them my art. I call them that because thats what i want to call them dammit! My opinion has no sense of appeal to you anyway so i am going to wrap this up with a simple goodbye and if you ever think of writing comments like that on my poems i would think twice because if you think 3 of my poems are worth shit then there is no ned for you toread nay other of my poems! goodbye for now my poor soul
Haha yeah
Then, Sir, perhaps you would enjoy the story "Dying Words" by David J Schow, available in "Best New Horror vol. 9", edited by Stephen Jones. It is about a man who, while typing a short story about zombies, finds himself turning into a zombie. Upon reading it, I declared it to be the most whimsical jape of the season!
explain harsh, because i'm guessing you mean harsh as in "brash" and "unpoetic", though you've previously stated it as being "mean". i just need the clarity for perfection
A woman after my own heart -9-
Hmmmm... A little melodramatic and defiantly not worthy of a darwin awarde. Try being either steping out of the norm, in how you kill yourself or describe it in a very detailed account till either the point of; last dying breath, lost strengh to continue writing, or shortly after regret for taking your life has just begun(anything longer than 3 lines there tends to get old). I prefer an odd way to die mixed with lose of ablitity to write further. -3-
consider these as replacing your last lines with(walls within, hidden behind my thick skin) -9-
Or perhaps you meant K where K = aleph_K, ie the limit of the series {aleph_0, aleph_aleph_0,...,}? I very much doubt there is such a big number. I doubt you are not a cad.
Yes, that is what horus8 would say. He's just very sensitive about his poetry, since none of it rhymes.
If I was not menstruating,
mumble mumble mumble
For Palestine West Virginia's favoutite vagina Laci Peterson.
cuz u could do better
It is not so much that I wanted to surprise the reader, but more that I wanted to portray the impact, and how it caught me.