Ranger
replying on Hermes Trigamestus (was not a monk edit) by Jeremi B. Handrinos
28 Jan 2003, 12:22 PM
Killer.
Um, I don't get it yet. Nice writing in places though. Perhaps I'll have another reread and come back again.
Bad manicure! Wonderful!!! I love you razorgrin.
Look, pinkbunny person, I just read your other two, and I've already left a comment about the style. I think everyone's in agreement that teen angst doesn't make for good poetry, and if you want people to take you seriously then you need to at least try to write serious poetry. Even if it isn't any good, people will feel more inclined to give help to a serious work than to a pointless piece of rage. As miss zzinnia said to me, it's the people who give you criticism that will make you a better writer (mostly). Try something new, there'll always be people who will give you good advice.
Anyway, you should love your parents. Unless they beat you or something.
Also, monk-man, did you misspell Buddha deliberately or was it due to the unfortunate positioning of your head in your sphincter at the time you first logged on?
Yeah, I played through Chrono Trigger yesterday. The issue, buddaboy, is that you make monumentally foolish statements on subjects you know nothing about. Don't read a poem and complain that the really obvious references are over your head. Just stick to the shallow end next time.
Not bad. Not the highlight of my life, but not bad. Bunnybrat, do you even know more than one story from Greek mythology?
"Like, ohmygawd, my parents are SOOO unfair!! They won't let me out to do crystal meth on a school night and they even say I wear too much makeup! Ohmygawd, I'm like so totally pissed. I'm going to make really half-assed inarticulate poemes about how I want to kill them!" Kiddo, you write like a nu-metal Charlie Manson. Except I doubt you could get any followers. Tell you what. I'll take you out on a nice Hot Topic shopping spree and then drive you up to the mall where you can scare the preppie normals. Cheer up, Buttercup! What exactly is a 'massacure'? A really bad manicure? Oh, yeah, I know. It's the result of a Grade 8 American public school education. Here, a zero of spoooky ragin' teenage angst.
pardon me nerds.
I know nothing of sorcerers stones
and underwater arithmatic.
Hey, but chrono trigger kicked ass!
I hope to stuudy up so that I can comprehend the intent of these "non traditional" mental maturbations.
"one love"
passion my evil friend drives you.
alchemist are passionate about their beliefs.
artist are passionate about their vision.
perverts are passionate about their perversion..
Definitely needs a third. more alchemy poems please, but possibly get into the topic a little more.
I have been meaning to ask you since your lovely debate with the Iowa fellow: Which Hawking kid are you?
Great knowledge of adjectives!!
wrap it up, h. this needs one more. 2 is not complete. give trigamestus the triad treatment, and then i will vote.
and it won't be a fucking 5.
<~>
replying on Hermes Trigamestus (was not a monk edit) by Jeremi B. Handrinos
28 Jan 2003, 8:16 AM
there is nothing undercover about h8, mr jones. his laundry's been on the clothesline in the front yard since he landed here at the ranker. recently, i believe he took some of his more, erm, intimate wear, down off the line (yes, it was dry ages ago, but not nearly aired out enough), but his scrawled-upon t-shirts and ripped jeans are still there.
p.s.--you won't find him on a star map. yet.
LOL. I see your point. Apparently it's not so easy to see mine (according to the first line of your last verse) :-) Just a bit of harmless fun - very immature I admit.
lol
I guess there's a point in there somewhere. Come out, come out, wherever you are!
Nicholas Jones
on Hermes Trigamestus (was not a monk edit) by Jeremi B. Handrinos
28 Jan 2003, 4:53 AM
Jeremi (if that is your real name) are you Horus8 gone undercover, deep into the darkest recesses of poemranker where his reputation will not preceed him. By the way, this neatly deconstructs the traditional haiku.
I agree it finished too quickly, but it was long enough already. It focuses on the preliminaries and the journey, not the destination. By the way, although it's pretty irrelevant, this did really happen.
Thank you.