Ace use of "choke" to rhyme with "smoke"!

I really love this. "That image of love will never sleep". Magic I think I agree with Tintagiles about the Osama's beard bit, however I like the use of angels, also the 'slaughter' maximises the effect of that part (I know I sound vague here, never mind). If you can find a way to replace the old beard this will be worth a ten on my behalf, till then you may have nine.

If only someone had told me that before I decided to read this poeme. Or before I ingested that rather unpleasant sclerotic diaper toolkit.

An enjoyable read (although it was quite difficult to concentrate-must not listen to Crash Test Dummies while reading poetry!). Yes, anyway-this is good, Mr. poetandknowit. I especially like the last bit of the second stanza very much. It's something slightly different to normal. Perhaps now that I've acknowledged you're a good writer you'll feel more inclined to give me some help? :) It would be greatly appreciated. Regardless, I think I'll give this a nine.

I have never seen a more klepto-masturbatory entrepoid. After reading this poeme, I think I've just glimpsed all our hypocracies in one huge neuroplastic ellipse. GREAT WORK!

This is the BEST, absolute BEST exploration of human themes I've ever read!!!! Oh wait... actually it's crap.

Well, it IS the closest thing to a not bad poeme written about that day I've yet read. Loose the angels and Osama's beard. 'Buried alive in mortar cots of crimson' is good, but how can it qualify as a 'slaughter' of innocent children when so few were killed?

There's always fiberglass insulation boxer biriefs or a nice razorwire g-string if the hemp undies seem too "hippie" for ya. lick the zero, baby. ohhh...yeah.. that's good.

Yes, that makes sense.

giggle giggle.

i wish i could wright like that 10.....

Christ! The post-modernity mades my legs ache. Say hello to Jacques for me.

In every mosque, in every church i can smell the effigys of horus burning (even then we can feel the warmth, see the light) as muslims would say....ahh this is bloody lovely innit, My brother scitz hates haikus but he liked this one, horus your a naughty naughty boy. *9*

oH mY gOd ! I thought we were gods toilet he seems to like shitting on us but I do dig this because its so blatantly controversial and your proud of it. The end line could win the war ! 9

Cant make total sense of it but you seem to know what your going on about. I love its vibe though, quite humorous was that intentional? -8

Raw piece, well done some striking images here and a good opening, last line dont work for me though-8

I liked this the 1st time I read it and voted 10 heres that vote again, I will however study not glance your work from now now on. (my work is less demanding), we've had our differences but I respect you.

But....Are you good looking?