Re: Front Range Toll Road by sliver	some deleted user 205.188.116.72	18-Apr-05/6:32 PM
Very creative...So, I can look for the headline: Local man saves tiny town through poetry. -10
Re: a comment on Perfect Answer by Alizarin_Crimson	Goad 80.132.208.141	18-Apr-05/3:23 PM
not that it answers it, but that reflect all you want it's the best answer you're getting.
Re: a comment on Perfect Answer by Alizarin_Crimson	Goad 80.132.208.141	18-Apr-05/3:21 PM
how do you get the didacticicism when the line before is "ACQUIESCing to a TOKEN cadence?" Since you know what didactic means, I have to assume you know what "acquiesce" & "token" mean -- does the suggestion that the birds' whole existence is helpless surrender to a rote living out of patterns for which there isn't a rational, external logical answer but which is a priori & pervasive not rule out for you the idea that the narrator is didactically urging us to "be cause"??????? <scratches head and looks disgruntled>
Re: a comment on Birmingham gardens by INTRANSIT	Goad 80.132.208.141	18-Apr-05/2:59 PM
Perhaps I'm really stretching, but is the end a homage to that famous hemingway short about the guy going fishing where he adroitly captures the shellshocked emotions of a returning war vet by carefully never mentioning them -- or any other emotion, and giving every detail exactly the same note right up to the end? this pome has a bit of that feel for me.
Re: 15 Minute poem by Damien	Goad 80.132.208.141	18-Apr-05/2:51 PM
Well, even though your grammar's terrible, you do certainly know how to rhyme. Many of the lines not only rhyme on the ends but have rhymes inside them! With all the breathtaking double rhymes I was getting my hopes up for a triple rhyme before the end...but perhaps you'll pull that off in your next opus.
Re: Swans by Alizarin_Crimson	Goad 80.132.208.141	18-Apr-05/2:46 PM
I actually really like the more more more -- it makes the whole pome for me. Because with the "they too must make their honest living" you wander dangerously close to hallmark/maudlin and the more more more yanks the reader back violently from that precipice.
Re: We Were Burnouts by jessicazee	thepinkbunnyofdoom 4.224.24.206	18-Apr-05/11:16 AM
I'm just going to be worthless and say I enjoyed this. <3 Jason
Re: a comment on Reincarnation by Dovina	thepinkbunnyofdoom 4.224.24.206	18-Apr-05/11:07 AM
If you were hindu, you could have gotten off with the easy answer of Karma/Dharma.
Re: Swans by Alizarin_Crimson	thepinkbunnyofdoom 4.224.24.206	18-Apr-05/10:34 AM
The car alarm screaming more, more, more, is a bit of a what the fuck, but I was enjoying it for the most part. Random Fact: Swans are vicious fighters(Bloody and to the death).
Re: Bad grammar and spelling mistakes by Damien	thepinkbunnyofdoom 4.224.24.206	18-Apr-05/10:25 AM
Excellent control, and the title fits the body well. -8-. <3 Jason
Re: a comment on Trying to get signed? by Damien	thepinkbunnyofdoom 4.224.24.206	18-Apr-05/10:12 AM
You are welcome.
Re: a comment on 15 Minute poem by Damien	thepinkbunnyofdoom 4.224.24.206	18-Apr-05/10:08 AM
I'm not one of the sticklers for "grammar", but it is an important aspect of writing.
Re: a comment on 15 Minute poem by Damien	thepinkbunnyofdoom 4.224.24.206	18-Apr-05/10:03 AM
If by attacking you mean, giving an honest and somewhat tactful opinion, I'm known for that. Everyone is egotistic(especially me). The difference between a street preformer and a concert musician is practice, and audience. With practice and editing, I think you might be a decent read. <3 Jason
Re: a comment on Half a dozen by thepinkbunnyofdoom	thepinkbunnyofdoom 4.224.24.206	18-Apr-05/9:49 AM
Yeah, silly little high school poems.
Re: a comment on Trying to get signed? by Damien	Damien 212.248.252.234	18-Apr-05/6:33 AM
What do you mean jesus is watching, isn't he?????!!!!!!!
Re: a comment on Trying to get signed? by Damien	Goad 213.61.217.3	18-Apr-05/5:18 AM
How come you say "fuck" all the time, but never actually write it out as "fuck"? Is it in case Jesus is watching? Just curious.
Re: Half a dozen by thepinkbunnyofdoom	Damien 212.248.252.234	18-Apr-05/3:18 AM
No real movement for me but it does represent what you can do with words.
Re: I want to slit my wrist and call it poetry by thepinkbunnyofdoom	Damien 212.248.252.234	18-Apr-05/2:49 AM
Very nice mouthfull, love the style, great talent and wonderfullllll subject.
Re: a comment on 15 Minute poem by Damien	Damien 212.248.252.234	18-Apr-05/2:46 AM
Sorry for the GASTLY grammar mistakes
Re: a comment on 15 Minute poem by Damien	Damien 212.248.252.234	18-Apr-05/2:20 AM
Thanks. But all this "attacking" is what your doing, I admit the poems I posted on this site are all "egotistic" but that is what I am aiming for. Keep reading lines that mean something like I do. I have never rehearsed them okay, they are what you want them to be. They are also only for me to see peoples response to a very egotistic person.