on Farm animals by INTRANSIT
18 Oct 2005, 3:49 PM
Your premise: "We only awaken once" It took awhile to see the sun as one awakened thing, the rooster as another. But then you say "then," well, seems it should be "or" or something not implying two awakenings of the same thing. And the butcher block - chips? Oh, somebody must be constructing it, because they don't give off chips in normal use. Then I lose you when chips awaken as farmer and farm.
replying on How Angels Smell by Dovina
18 Oct 2005, 3:38 PM
Okay, immitate British spelling if you think it adds good stuff: flavour, colour, odour. Just beware the errour, the tremour, the inferiour humour your apt to find here.
on Air Guitar by Miggy
18 Oct 2005, 3:10 PM
"through the night"
I disagree with "one day we will get this world right."
I disagree with "one day we will get this world right."
on a skinny man on the dock by ay deee
17 Oct 2005, 7:10 PM
May I steal your last line? It's great - could use it in lots of places. But it doesn't seem to fit here.
on There is a journey tree by ALChemy
16 Oct 2005, 6:28 AM
The metaphor brings up fears that the tree, perched on the brink, will eventually fall over, as real trees so perched usually do when a storm comes. But the greater fear is that any such hypothetical refuge doesn't really exist.
on Waking at night by Niphredil
15 Oct 2005, 12:47 PM
The word "dull" seems too bland. Otherwise I like it a lot.
on never visit a diner twice by Bill Z Bub
15 Oct 2005, 12:42 PM
No comma after diner. I think that "left in the gutter" makes the idea inconsistant. I'd leave out "left." Otherwise very concise and good.
on Sleep It All Away by somemorepoetry
15 Oct 2005, 12:37 PM
Line 4 seems there only for the rhyme.
Just wrap YOUR arms all around me.
But I like the sentiment and the subtle implications. With thr right tune, it'd make a good song.
Just wrap YOUR arms all around me.
But I like the sentiment and the subtle implications. With thr right tune, it'd make a good song.
replying on The Servant and The Messenger by ALChemy
15 Oct 2005, 12:15 PM
Your summary is good up to your rephrasing of my my last response. My answer to "And what's the point of saying that anyway?" was not "Blaaaaaaaat." Please read it again.
replying on Rocky Road by Dovina
15 Oct 2005, 12:07 PM
I am so flattered.
on Creatures That Crawl To Me by D P Robertson
14 Oct 2005, 11:15 AM
A dream of redundant fears. Could be a lot shorter, but maybe you wanted to stress the recurrance.
on Midnight Questions by TLRufener
14 Oct 2005, 11:11 AM
I answered in the negative or with unconcern to most of your questions, but "How many people would mourn you and cry?" is worthy of thought.
on I Can't Believe He Killed Her by jessicazee
14 Oct 2005, 10:59 AM
And maybe he didn't. The sister coming along late in the poem - ok, but confusing. Comma after "I think." Good overall.
replying on The Servant and The Messenger by ALChemy
14 Oct 2005, 10:52 AM
For the gazillionth time, evolution is a theory that explains observations. It may not be the only theory that explains them, but it works much of the time. So, it's a good theory til something better coimes along. I hope you will at least agree with this.
I think at this point you're just being antagonistic for its own sake.
I think at this point you're just being antagonistic for its own sake.
replying on The Servant and The Messenger by ALChemy
12 Oct 2005, 6:00 PM
Nonsense!
replying on The Servant and The Messenger by ALChemy
12 Oct 2005, 5:58 PM
I agree with your thesis. Saying that something is made by evolution gives it importance because it says that it fits a theory, and in fitting, the thing can be understood in the context of that theory. For example, if faith developed through evolution, then the broader concepts of evolution can be applied to faith. For exaample, we could say in that case that faith may then increase our ability to survive and reproduce, which would help to perpetuate faith in future generations.