on some deleted poem
5 May 2003, 1:55 PM
I can hear the acoustic guitar in the background.
on some deleted poem
14 Oct 2002, 1:55 PM
yum
on some deleted poem
5 May 2003, 1:53 PM
Kind of generic. Could use some more real concrete imagery. What kinds of talk at dinner? What were you eating? WHat did you learn from them? I can't tell here.
on some deleted poem
9 Jan 2003, 11:29 PM
That is fucking amazing. you are a keyboard artist extraordinaire.
on Flamin Monkey's by Blade
23 Oct 2002, 4:15 PM
Your plural of 'monkeys' should exclude the apostrophes. I like anything with monkeys.
on journey to being the top rapper by kliq
23 Oct 2002, 4:18 PM
good luck at the lucrative world of pro rapping. i heard there's a real market these days!
on some deleted poem
21 Oct 2002, 7:54 PM
Maybe the last line..just leave out the "to last all season." "There are comforts enough" (?)
The line..."She has spent.." hm, another word for spent? Baked? I dunno. Me likey though.
Hm. I love the breadsmelling.
The line..."She has spent.." hm, another word for spent? Baked? I dunno. Me likey though.
Hm. I love the breadsmelling.
on some deleted poem
18 Oct 2002, 12:43 AM
i love the words "sugar dumpling" and will use them now whenever I can
on always the end to this good night by nentwined
30 Sep 2002, 3:45 PM
use more concrete imagery, but I like your style
on some deleted poem
14 Jan 2003, 4:02 PM
I think the spelling is "volition".
this poem freaked the bejesus from me, as if I haven't lost enough of my bejesus already.
this poem freaked the bejesus from me, as if I haven't lost enough of my bejesus already.