on How I fuck Freud off in the shower by horus8
13 Jun 2003, 11:18 AM
LOL, seriously. I'm nominating this for a GOLDEN Q-TIP. -10-
on some deleted poem
22 Jun 2003, 9:27 AM
Thats how I send every sunday night, Don't you?
on some deleted poem
22 Jun 2003, 9:34 AM
Grrr... Now I have to wait til next season!! They always do that! But I think it might just be worth the wait. -8-
on Air sickness bag by Shardik
17 Jun 2003, 10:01 PM
Indeed fine sir. Indeed. -9-
on The Bastard Earth by Kitch
17 Jun 2003, 12:36 PM
I hated the first stanza, it was shit to be honest but the rest works well for the most part. There are some nice lines here, and some shitty ones too. I loved "Identity was divorced from liberty", quite smashing indeed. As for Angels I can see you haven't met our own -=Dark_Angel=- and all I can say is may -=Jesu=- Be as kind to you as I am. -9-
on This aint love, its shit by Kitch
17 Jun 2003, 12:42 PM
Learn to be "Friends with Benifits" -6-
Again horrible 1st stanza, I'd ditch it all together. Other than that not bad, borderline cliche, at parts the ryhming works, in others I wish you'd just come out say what your saying how you'd say it naturally(i.e. you stopped ryhming third stanza, and it should have stuck that way). -7-
on Fate Sucks by Kitch
17 Jun 2003, 1:26 PM
Kitch, Take my advice, lose the ryhme. Sometimes it works for you but most often it hampers, instead of helping your poems. It just tend to hold them back. Nice image "drown in sunshine on the lake" by the way. -7-
on It's funny by Dangzter
16 Jun 2003, 10:47 AM
Your right it is. I actually laughed out loud reading this. In fact I'd just like to take the time to say
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Okay, nope not yet
Hahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahah
Here just take your -10-
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Okay, nope not yet
Hahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahah
Here just take your -10-
on Pendulum swing lines by INTRANSIT
15 Jun 2003, 11:31 AM
I think "Distant friend,". Other than that, Fairly nice. -7-
on New school nursery rhymes by DeadtotheWorld
15 Jun 2003, 11:40 AM
Could have been done better, should have ryhmed better in some places (i.e. Jack be nimble, but he just synched his) and You forgot some major ones such as Humpty Dumpty, Litte Mack Horner, and Little Miss Blew Sheep. -1- just because you took my Idea and fucked it up. J/K -7-.
on some deleted poem
16 Jun 2003, 10:50 AM
Sorry, I guess you fail to see Horus Mocking you. Look there he is, and Oh whats that little freeverse down there for? Mock, Mock. <-Just messing with you, not nearly as good as your other 2 so far. -7-
on To Mouse and Reason by Spindle
15 Jun 2003, 11:47 AM
Pimple Poem Buddy. Felt by you and every one else. Love the Title, Hate the Drivel beneath. Not trying to be mean but I've got a bummer sticker that says the same damn thing without being nearly as long or annoyingly repeative, while stating the obvious.
on Goddess of the vineyard by INTRANSIT
13 Jun 2003, 11:26 AM
Interesting Idea about the spiritual influence but it still sounds like a stretch to me. I Love this poem by the way. -10-
on One Night Stand by Audaciouslilgrl
13 Jun 2003, 1:16 PM
Yes, I think it sounds better but I still don't like the 'A wishful ache' because It seems to me that your saying the momentary release is a wishful ache, when I think it'd go better as 'With a wishful ache'. Still a -9- cause its very good.
on some deleted poem
22 Jun 2003, 9:31 AM
I see potential, Indeed.
on Angels Struggle by SupremeDreamer
22 Jun 2003, 9:25 AM
Well written but lacking emotion. -7-
on OM by SupremeDreamer
22 Jun 2003, 9:21 AM
Poem didn't do anything for me what-so-ever, But the conversation with D.A. was LMAO!!! For that alone a -10-