on In the middle by celticskatermatt1
14 Dec 2006, 12:56 PM
No deaths is good. Try adding an extra syllable in l5 and two more l8 (maybe after "No deaths"); trust me it will flow better. Also the "the" in l8 is superfluous.
on untitled by MacFrantic
14 Dec 2006, 12:50 PM
I sense some contempt. Fantastic writing. 10.
on I've thought a lot by MacFrantic
12 Oct 2006, 1:36 PM
Now I can die enlightened.
on love by *.*ReAdY To SnAp.*.
12 Oct 2006, 1:32 PM
Isn't "sucks" some sort of description. I'm sure you could elaborate. Until then,
this poem sucks
no way describe it
(Other than that it sucks, of course)
this poem sucks
no way describe it
(Other than that it sucks, of course)
on Pain by PoeticJustice
26 Sep 2006, 2:30 PM
I think this might be something Keanu Reeves wrote when he was thirteen. I better not criticize this further though; his "anger engulfs him" and that sounds dangerous.
on Shadows In Your Eyes by PoeticJustice
26 Sep 2006, 1:51 PM
The rhyme and rhythm are very forced. The structure of the poem is almost an afterthought, you might want to consider incorperating them while writing instead.
on The Dovina Memorial Bike Lane by Dovina
26 Sep 2006, 1:47 PM
If nothing else, the subject matter is completely original. Great idea; wish i'd thought of it.
on Suicide Dream by Ranger
21 Sep 2006, 10:29 AM
How 17th century of you. There's a very nice flow to this and the word choice is perfect.
on Musical Buttocks - Cha cha cha by Edna Sweetlove
21 Sep 2006, 10:26 AM
I'm in complete agreement with you, although you failed to mention the large amount of fecal matter that inspired Beethoven's Symphony 'Number 2' in D Major.
on Its Hard to Say by celticskatermatt1
21 Sep 2006, 10:17 AM
"Ohhhhh, if you want possession, it's just 'ITS', but is you want a conjunction, it's 'IT apostrophy S' ... scalawag."
Very nice.
Very nice.
replying on A Sexy Crucifixion Poem by Edna Sweetlove
17 Aug 2006, 10:27 AM
It's being renovated.
on flow-charts by FreeFormFixation
12 Aug 2006, 6:30 PM
Very nice.
on Not for me by MacFrantic
12 Aug 2006, 6:29 PM
A sophisticated Shel Silverstein piece. 10.
on A spectacular poem by a handsome man by <{Baba^Yaga}>
12 Aug 2006, 6:09 PM
Not fucking bad. Entertaining. 9.
on A Sexy Crucifixion Poem by Edna Sweetlove
12 Aug 2006, 5:43 PM
Wow, how trendy of you to be so contrversial. Homo-erotic biblical poetry may be a somewhat original topic but this is written poorly and is plain tasteless. I can only assume it is on the best list through your own efforts.
on Southern Baptist Redneck Song by Edna Sweetlove
12 Aug 2006, 5:37 PM
Touchy subject. Is this all you know how to write.
on A Poem For George Bush by Edna Sweetlove
12 Aug 2006, 5:33 PM
This looks just like some bullshit that someone would forward to my email (and I wouldn't be surprised if it was) as if this is news. I know all this shit already, and writing it in the form of emotional guilt-tripping garbage doesn't make it anything more than exactly that. 0.
on The Western World by mrpresident
12 Aug 2006, 5:14 PM
Why can't people write anything but sappy shit about the same tired subjects?
on How To Ride a Bicycle by Dovina
11 Aug 2006, 10:19 PM
Finally; direction.