Lines 2 and 7 seem a wee off beat. but it's quite enjoyable.

We r the idiots that forever be Invading every country from air,land or sea

Settle i know its hard being the loser always.......but don't let these idiots discourage you....1 for effort

A sound contraption.

You have to be jolly creative to write a poeme about soaring on clouds.

Actually, this one isn't bad. Any specific problems?

Bravo. A pivital work for you. You are always honest, but the simplicity and directness of language here is a new tool, and you wield it with the quiet assurance of a skilled craftsman. I am so happy for this poem, what a gift to leave the world, an unobstructed view into the inner life. THAT, in my opinion, is the most influencial and potent kind of art. To put these kinds of thoughts and emotions out there adds so much to existence. Anyone who reads this will have a new thread of color running through their personal tapestry. It adds texture and one more layer of flavor to the stew. Bravo. Great first line. The path is clear, and easy to follow, beginning to end. The scene with your grandmother on her hospital bed and you playing what ever role neccesary, there's is so much love there. I just love this poem.

I think myriad(s). I think when you wrote this, you sat down and wrote without thinking, just wrote. and it works. 8 I think the other is better because you put work into it. both are swell.

might I ask why you feel the need to harass this site?

love the connection between mom and daughter.

Great. Now take a look at the small details. 1) Get rid of "They" in lines 2 & 3 2) "A sun"? As far as our perciviable reality goes there is only one sun, so unless you're intent is to point out the existence of other suns, it should read "the sun" 3) "Bastard" is a personification of day, so follow through and use the possessive pronoun his or her, and not its for consistency. 4)"Their howling" Whos? The wools? The servants? Both? Clear this up. 5)Present tense "Comatose" not comatosed. 6) the last line is unclear as to its meaning. Are you asking if their is any poet awake? then ask that. "Is THERE a poet awake" Are you asking is the poet in a state of wakefulness when full of insomniac dreams? Try "filled with". Do you believe a poet is more 'awake' then a non-poet, or less 'awake', lost in the day-dream? that's an interesting question, is that what you are trying to explore.

you call yourself a self obsessed loser With a sense of humour? This is ok not as good as the first one though

This is awful hard work to read Some nice images, some surreal images plenty of creative energy

very good The sentiment matches the sound of the poem well, flows like a lucid confession

Yes the best ive read of yours so far mature style, a few gentle rhymes to surprise

Well, if that doesn't stir the peasents to rise up I don't know what will. except maybe this. "Nicholas Martin at Singing Hills 2002 Nicholas Martin announces his programme Photo: © Webbwize Once again it was to a capacity audience that Nicholas Martin played his 2002 concert at Singing Hills. As we have ome to expect from Nicholas, his styles were varied as was the music that he played. Making for a highly entertaining afternoon. Nicholas Martin at the 3/19 console. Photo: © Webbwize All left hand work and a rest for the right!. Photo: © Webbwize Perhaps his crowning glory though was The Storm, played a la Reginald Dixon, and giving the WurliTzer quite an excercising, which it survived well. More than I did, as it was hot in the cupboard where the light switches are, and I had to imitate the lightning whilst unble to see the effect! A very popular young man, with much talent to give the public. A week after his Singing Hills concert Nicholas was off to the USA where apparently standing ovations are the norm for him. Not surprising, especially after watching his Blackpool technique, Floridians are in for a goodly treat! Good luck Nicholas, and please return to Singing Hills soon. Nicholas Martin takes a bow. Photo: © Webbwize Nicholas Martin - 2002 concert. Photo: © Webbwize" http://www.theatreorgans.co.uk/reviews/singhills/nmartin.html Did anyone see where my teeth landed perchance, or the top button on my fine pressed silk trousers... Anyone?

Have you ever listened to song three on Beck's mellow gold. You should. It's called "We will see who's fucking with my hand" I believe I once recall seeing him play it live with trained crickets and three obese and naked celloists. I bring it up because the cupboard was hot during that show, and boy did thoses crickets get a firm excercising7

you crack me up

Ignore me. I'm polluted and need to clear my head.

....because you can....