Ranger
on The Golden Rule by Quarton
15 Jan 2003, 6:06 AM
Are you a dualist?
damn.that's one of the best you've written.
This shit still here?
Nice one!
Didn't like it. I thought it was vulgar (vulgar adj. from the Latin vulgaris meaning of, or pertaining to, the masses; common)
By the by, what time is it over there?
Pretty good. The other one you just submitted was better, but still I like this quite a bit. 2nd to last stanza rocks.
You probably don't need advice from a teenager, however I am going to say that the third stanza doesn't totally fit in with the more ethereal atmosphere of the rest of it...however it all depends on what sort of people this is aimed at.
Don't let that detract from the fact that this is very good! 8
Ye-es. Not sure what to make of this...maybe another read will do it justice.
Like a Siamese twin. I'll give you an eight for this, mainly because I like it.
Good work. Yet more references to butterflies.
You could be Dr. Seuss-in-a-box! Liked the first stanza!
Probably your best poeme. Congratulations!
wow..that was really long, and to tell the truth, i got tired of reading and listening to those images. beautiful though they were, they didn't seem to have a purpose. i might suggest breaking it up, and shelving until you need a descriptive line or to.
also, was this metered? just wondering because it said free verse and i'm very confusedd.
keep writing!a
This will be the wall paper for my bedroom i have printed 1157 copies and my room looks fantastic.
The last line was ideal for the pipe gap under the radiators. I would guess bobjim is a casanova in bed if he is this patient at hand typing he has a lot to offer women everywhere, so i am giving you the Don Juan Da Marco award for home improvements and bedroom skills, genius, can't wait to see the sequel will it be called 'off'
Must I ignore?
Nurk.
Mr Tintagiles, she may have been tripping in the woods, but you've been tripping at your computer! Acid abounds etc.
Wonderful poem. 9