==Doylum
on one word by Blade
21 Oct 2002, 9:16 AM
Off
WE MIGHT PERCEIVE YOUR WORDS AS MORE ROMANTIC IF YOU DIDN'T SHOUT ALL THE TIME.
The clover doesn't so much feed honey as affect it. would it work as
The clover affects the honey
The way you affect my soul.
shouldn't it be 'they abash'?
i don't buy the warm bit. nor the verve. the sea is ancient and mighty., not young and spritely.
Very good. malaria net and huck fin are my favorites. Its errol flynn isn't it?
Silent voices cannot be heard. I couldn't read any further after that.
Curses. Another great talent appears on poemranker. We are becoming swamped in talent. I may have to leave again.
what did you do with no1? Put it back up scallywag.
On 6th read I very much kike this as is. You have a rawness which perhaps should stay raw.
Well done!!!!!
Super!!!!
Er, what? I'm baffled. Perhaps you had to be there.
'There is abundance enough to last the season'? Oh, i don't know. I think the last line reads OK as it is, I didn't pick up on it as Zzinnia did.
There's quite a few typos. this doesn't flow very well, I think partially because of the afore mentioned.
I separated the last 2 lines aand did'n get what Zzinnia did either. I think it's ok. I see Zzinnias point though. Tell us when to vote.
the poem speaks truth... fear seems to have gripped the areas surrounding these attacks. But, people shouldn't be afraid of this poor excuse for a human being. I live in Richmond... but I'm not afraid... I wouldn't give that p**k the satisfaction :o)
Limerics are fun, arent they? I like anything that makes me laugh.
I don't get line 2.
and then you stopped.
excellent.