Re: a comment on Math Poem 3 by Dovina	Dovina 69.175.6.101	1-Jan-05/1:28 PM
Give them extra credit for singing under water, or cleaning the blackboard with their tongues, or keeping their fingernails clean, but please, never for writing poetry.
Re: An Ode To An Angel by Bhaskaryya	jroday 204.215.33.104	1-Jan-05/3:11 AM
When the sun rises my angel, I shall be there with thee Never allowing thy soul to stray from me.Just a little something from my next poem. I really like this poem, keep up the good work -9-
Re: Math Poem 3 by Dovina	jroday 204.215.33.104	1-Jan-05/1:13 AM
My students loves reading your math poems. I think Im going to let them write one for extra credit, since they keep asking me. Felicia
Re: An Ode To An Angel by Bhaskaryya	Bhaskaryya 61.0.144.107	31-Dec-04/8:38 PM
I wrote that waaaay back!! So please comment accordingly. I know it's not good!!
Re: a comment on Lovelier Than Love by Bhaskaryya	jroday 204.215.33.8	31-Dec-04/12:33 PM
No I dont think so. Perhaps I am getting to old to keep up with you young people at age fifty (smile)
Re: a comment on Possession by Acid_moose	jroday 204.215.33.8	31-Dec-04/12:21 PM
Seem to me you were a little depressed at the beginning of the poem,but you got yourself together. Remember love with esteem cannot go far or reach high. It is an angel with only one wing. -9-
Re: a comment on My Wife by Dovina	Dovina 69.175.6.101	31-Dec-04/10:40 AM
Yes, I’m a goil, or a woiman, trying a hand at thinking like a goi. The mission is to think about how a man feels when hen pecked, when made to feel that if he doesn’t conform to her remaking of him, then he doesn’t get her blessing.
Re: My Wife by Dovina	Shuushin 64.222.177.181	31-Dec-04/10:24 AM
Well, I really thought you was a goil. Maybe you are doing a perspective thing (sometimes I pretend I'm human). I think you have to be a goil. So. As it is then. Having trouble finding its mission, and if I have then it was found by the end of the second stanza. Made me consider it though, without hesitation.
Re: My Beliefs by jroday	Acid_moose 209.208.77.42	31-Dec-04/9:37 AM
thats great,i don't really know if it was a poem or not, but it had a lesson and it made you think a little so its good enough for me, 9
Re: Below Tide by D. $ Fontera	Dovina 69.175.6.101	31-Dec-04/9:15 AM
Verse 2 is especially nice. It can happen anywhere.
Re: Separation by MacFrantic	Dovina 69.175.6.101	31-Dec-04/8:56 AM
A comma after remonstrate would relieve some ambiguity. And conventional spacing would help. It's quite good, really, just hard to wade through at first.
Re: a comment on Math Poem 2 by Dovina	Dovina 69.175.6.101	31-Dec-04/8:35 AM
Please return later today for the exciting continuation of math poems. Number 3 will astound you! Happy New Year!
Re: willitwork by FreeFormFixation	Dovina 69.175.6.101	31-Dec-04/8:32 AM
The first half implies some trick of writing you are planning, but I don't see it coming through. Quotes around the second half imply a note you left for her to find as if by accident. But the line about a charade doesn't work if that's true.
Re: a comment on Math Poem 2 by Dovina	Dan garcia-Black 66.218.59.79	31-Dec-04/8:31 AM
Will there be a Math Poem 3? I can hardly wait to find out if 3=1+1+1 or if 3=cute+more cuter+most cutest. Actually, the only math I understand is the bills and paycheck in my hand=0. I'm going to pawn my bass today so I can buy a bottle of Andre's Champagne for tonight's midnight toast. Happy New Year!!!
Re: Elopement by Sasha	Dovina 69.175.6.101	31-Dec-04/8:24 AM
Romantic! It's like Beach Villanelle, but better, a lot better. I must complain, however, about "magnified" because anything reflected from a person's eye is not magnified, but reduced in size as in a convex mirror. Overall very appealing.
Re: a comment on My Beliefs by jroday	jroday 204.215.33.226	31-Dec-04/6:47 AM
I was sitting here in rehab, and listing to the other patients talk about different things, and I decided to write this, whether It was a poem or not. I tell my elder son blacksoul, you can focus on the obstacles, or you can go on and decide what your going to do about it. To me, it breaks down to that; you can do and not just be.
Re: The Secret by nentwined	Shuushin 70.16.215.115	31-Dec-04/6:40 AM
Do I agree with the premise? I agree we made gods, but as for the reason - we'd have to agree on a definition of an adult. I put this in the category of "thoughts that might turn into poems".
Re: KAT 2 by nentwined	Shuushin 70.16.215.115	31-Dec-04/6:37 AM
Very much liked this, NW. I didn't expect the type of language from you, and it's laid in consistently and to good effect. It flows kindof moth-like, doesn't it? Great ending.
Re: Mallard by richa	Shuushin 70.16.215.115	31-Dec-04/6:04 AM
I try to make my own conclusions without reading the other comments, but I share Dovina's unease with "chimera". Having trouble with the disparity it implies, because I don't see it in the action. And the only link I see with the beak is with the color partially matching the flames breathed by that mythical beast - but that is a longshot at best. Fire/Water disparity?? - I actually wouldn't be too surprised if *you* were going for that (and that is meant as a compliment). Otherwise, its a soothing piece. Mellow with an interesting but not startling turn. "plumped tail" is very nice. Don't know what would work better than "lob", maybe "float" for several reasons you can probably see for yourself. But lob works well too.
Re: Elopement by Sasha	richa 81.178.233.69	31-Dec-04/5:07 AM
I have no doubt you write well.