Lol...I wrote this one about a guy I was dating who lived in Chicago (I live in AZ duh) so I just woke up one night and wrote it, these things come to me in my sleep...strangest thing :)

block even

have you got writters bloke? you haven't written a poem for at least 2 minutes!!!

surely one egg would have been un oeuf!!!!111 quack quack quack quack

A nice quick and jaunty one-off. Probably built itself - maybe could use some reformatting/restructuring now that you know what it's about. entertaining in any case.

I dunno. could do without a few of the cliches and stock images. I actually thought maybe it was satire toward the middle there, started hoping for a twist ending. Must be getting jaded in my old age.

You should put that on the special skills section of your resume. You'd freak'em out in management.

You need a fuckin' heater, man.

nice design -8-

Well this is definitely better than your last piece. I totally know how it feels to want someone so bad even though you are fully aware they could care less. Still, it seems like a rant. Your ellipses is missing a third dot...

0_o I'm lost. Ok, so you hurt someone and you feel guilty about it. BUT, the sight of them being happy makes you want to die?

Do you think the united nations is concerned as much about electrons as you are?

Good this, again though the last line should be your power punch and 'adoring them' isn't there. The poem certainly strikes a chord.