BEEN DONE ON TV.DULL

nice repetative use of repeated repetition

the repetitive use of repetition is nice

nice use of repetition

The use of "rinkle" to rhyme with "trinkle" is inspired. Indeed, the use of "trinkle" alone sets this piece out from the... er crowd. The crowd of poemes. That are all crowding around my face. Also, great use of ravens to... well not to rhyme... because ravens doesn't really rhyme with heavens... but great use of ravens, anyway. I couldn't imagine a heaven without ravens. It would be like trying to imagine washing your car without a sausage roll sellotaped to your right knee. Imagine that. I did. But I made an absolute bosh of it.

Great use of "talked" to rhyme with "walked" and "abridge" to rhyme with... "bridge". I especially enjoyed "Betrayal occurred". Are you a pro?

nice use of repetition

reads more like an opinion than a poem structure is good though and logic is clear, well logic is always clear

yes I would change lacerated too, it just seems out of place. Overall though very delicate and in the spirit of haiku(if not quite the syllable count)

very vividly told very fairytale like, gentle

Very well re-worded chap. I was a little tired whn I read it the first time. The elimination of the giving up helped alot. I prefer it without the humor, however,YOU thought it fitting. Therefore it has value. A wise poet said to me: Don't write to make others like your poetry. Write to make them think. This above all: To thine own self be true. Shakespeare. Keep up the efforts, they are paying off.

I'm no haiku expert but I find this quite beautiful. My mind snags the petals on the thorns and they never reach ground though.

Wow you really want to let your opinion out...don't let me stop you.

Sorry, my friend Mr Pig dude, but this is two syllables over for a haiku. Perhaps if you changed 'lacerated' to 'ripped', or even 'torn' (to go with 'thorns' albeit badly) then you will be 1 syllable under the limit (this is beginning to sound like we're talking about drink-driving now). Then I reckon you could turn the first 'like' into 'as if' which would take you to exactly 17 and would eliminate the repetition of like. That's my opinion anyway. Aside from that, I enjoyed this haiku, the laceration and bleeding was well done, and you got the element of sadness spot on. Good stuff. I won't vote now, I will let you digest my thoughts and decide what you want to do and hopefully later I'll come back and take another look.

Fantastic...one of the few poems anywhere to actually grip me until the end. Absolutely beautiful. 10 and let this hopefully take you into the top 15 because this is worth it.

good, but I would end losing the last line instead for another line of impeccably aloof metaphors.