Comments byINTRANSIT, 1081–1100 back, including replies. Only comments on poems

on the meeting by richa 30 Sep 2003, 8:28 PM
Something tells me this is just right. yes, yes. Somehow I get this and it works. Excellent.
on Timber! by Shardik 29 Sep 2003, 6:12 PM
Here's a joke for you: knawk knawk....
replying on Trapped in a horseshoe by INTRANSIT 29 Sep 2003, 4:03 PM
don't you mean a brief (lesson)? god. I'm AWFUL tonight.
replying on EGG by ?-Dave_Mysterious-? 29 Sep 2003, 3:57 PM
bad egg-drop soup? i kill me.
replying on Trapped in a horseshoe by INTRANSIT 29 Sep 2003, 3:54 PM
I was gonna describe an imaginary woman using liquors as coloration for what she was wearing, skin tone etc. I was two Zins to the wind and 4 rewrites later....
on War Grave by Caducus 29 Sep 2003, 3:43 PM
How many years have we been on this planet? And we've still learned nothing. still doing the same ol' same ol'. What's taking Jesu so damned long? Held up in a fast food line no doubt. Maybe just... held up?
on EGG by ?-Dave_Mysterious-? 29 Sep 2003, 3:37 PM
I think your caps should be in the middle of line three, giving it somewhat of an arc. Like a small girl grossed out and sqealing. funny funny funny.
replying on Ode to the Renesis by INTRANSIT 26 Sep 2003, 1:37 PM
no prob. the best way to have friends... is to be one. i'm kosher. sometimes dill. mostly kosher.
on Life's Work by baughworm 26 Sep 2003, 1:16 PM
cumbersome/heavy-redundant, in fact, lose the not started stanza altogether. and I don't like (poor sod) either. i get the geeling you're trying to end this on a positive note. poor sod doesn't fit. put it back on the lift, and adjust accordingly. whv.
replying on Ode to the Renesis by INTRANSIT 26 Sep 2003, 1:06 PM
meh. thanks. with all the messes I have to fix, this will probably die.
thank you. I try to be as personable as possible. i fall from time to time. i appreciate any poem that introduces me to something new. thanks again.
might i ask why?
on Brighton Beach by Caducus 25 Sep 2003, 5:38 PM
last line in s-1 took a wrong turn for me. otherwise....
I won't spoil this for the others.
on body image by http://mulberryfairy 25 Sep 2003, 5:00 PM
wordiness is an advantage. more to work with. unlike my sometimes ground-up-bones-for-a-poem style. Seriously, spend some time with this and the fox poem. both have plenty going for them. whv.
replying on One Moment to the Other (v3) by nentwined 23 Sep 2003, 7:24 AM
yeah, i know. i'm still racking my brain to make (fighting erosion) better in the third stanza. grrrr.
on One Moment to the Other (v3) by nentwined 23 Sep 2003, 7:19 AM
I'm not keen on emery for some reason. I suspect the stanza would need to be revised to correct and I know what a pain that can be. otherwise, this flows much better.
replying on Intersection poetry by INTRANSIT 23 Sep 2003, 7:16 AM
as fast as i was going, i'm lucky i saw the damn thing. could I have a moment on : lunge fish, please. thank you. further eh? hmmm.
on this is your poetry by nentwined 23 Sep 2003, 7:05 AM
If we followed this, would poemranker cease to exist?
on You are a divider by Bachus 15 Sep 2003, 5:02 PM
Suggestion: DON'T Love with your all. Save some for yourself. It won't affect the intensity level at all. It's another dimension behind the levels. go.