replying on forwards by nentwined
8 May 2004, 2:38 PM
Hmm. I think I see what you're saying there, but it really doesn't seem out of place to me. The rainbow of all these tomorrows is hope (ish), so it in that sense it does happen before the tomorrows happen, and is thus present, and directly related to the tears, though not actually reflecting from them; it would be reflecting _in_ them.
Thanks for the comments--my understanding is that 'forward' and 'fowards' are rather interchangeable, as 'toward' and 'towards', though I've seen arguments about both. Thanks for the comments--I know the angst of angst poems, but sometimes you (I?) just "have to do them", as much as I hate that. And I'm far too much of an attention-hound to write a poem and not display it for feedback; sometimes I really wonder where my ones and twos are. [[that's not a request, though!]]
on Sonnet on an Operating Table by Sasha
8 May 2004, 12:02 PM
very cute. and points for being the first poster of the form.
replying on clay or mud (hertz donut version) by nentwined
6 May 2004, 1:24 PM
No other version as of yet. Yes, it is a regression. The thought is if I like the thought better, I will do a less regressed version of it. It was a ditty that came up while discussion some things with Aetius.
on There Is No Such Thing As A Poem by Aetius
30 Apr 2004, 11:53 AM
I really like half of the lines, here. And the idea behind it. Actually, the more I read it, the more I like the idea behind it. moving a six to a seven.
favorite bits: monsters, ecstatic catharsis, and the syllabic trellises. :)
favorite bits: monsters, ecstatic catharsis, and the syllabic trellises. :)
replying on do androids dream? by nentwined
28 Apr 2004, 12:04 PM
Indeed, I have, and thank you. :)
on The How To on Haikus by <Wankster>
23 Apr 2004, 3:08 PM
"you've mastered the haiku poem" -- 8. I can't tell if that's satire or a mistake. 6.
replying on Radiation Reflections by sarah
23 Apr 2004, 1:13 PM
The tone of the poem is very humerous, as if it were tongue-in-cheek. The flow of the first stanza, the fact that you rhyme "as they pleases", ...
Perhaps the poem simply doesn't convey what you were trying to put into it.
Perhaps the poem simply doesn't convey what you were trying to put into it.
replying on Seven Sins for Seven Men (Part 1) by wilco
22 Apr 2004, 2:08 PM
sorry, part one.
la.
la.
on Seven Sins for Seven Men (Part 1) by wilco
22 Apr 2004, 2:07 PM
nice, but where are the six other sins?
on The Price You Pay by Fear of Garbage
22 Apr 2004, 12:40 PM
interesting.
on Tribute To Edgar Allen Poe by Fear of Garbage
22 Apr 2004, 12:38 PM
I don't get it.
Besides that, "aloud -> allowed".
Besides that, "aloud -> allowed".
replying on do androids dream? by nentwined
22 Apr 2004, 10:34 AM
That's a beautiful quote, thank you. :)
replying on do androids dream? by nentwined
22 Apr 2004, 8:33 AM
One bright morning in the middle of the night,
An android took pause from flight,
Found a sheep lost from its owner,
and from the roof she pushed it over.
An android took pause from flight,
Found a sheep lost from its owner,
and from the roof she pushed it over.
replying on sitting at the cliff's edge by nentwined
21 Apr 2004, 7:13 PM
Thank you. With new eyes (it's been a while) I think I wholly agree with "clinging us tighter, each to the other". :)