Not too shabby...

As always - a pleasure.

A good title... Anyways, that's a start.

At first I was going to glue this to my neighbor's face, but then I enjoyed your finally.

"But she went to there to stay." My friend Vipersna invented this form, you are a thief! Nah, there are some interesting normal reactions to abandonment here, you are not alone, hang on, to this 6.

This is just gross...where is your point?

Not quite as good as the insanity dance poem, still quite touching...8.

A tiny bit over the top. 7.

Not bad...7

I'm sorry, but I just can't see through the sap. You can probably get a job with Hallmark, though. The sentiment is worthy of pursuit and I don't doubt that it comes from the heart. Just not my cup o' tea.

Ahh, isn't that just sweet... now diE! Just kidding.

Must you say that naughty word that has nothing to do with skin color other than 1,ooo's of years of persecution and lies, death, humilty, fear. Because... Even words need to be set free from their sterotypage by generations of unimaginative flesh peddlars.

After stanza seven... It goes stupid, but up until that point I was thinking 9 all the way, and giggled quite a few times. Very imaginative, I must say. Here's a 7

You're just fucking around with stuff what made childhood easier to get though. Plus its a simple copy, not even of anything great. Excapt of memories of being young and blind to the World of Hate.(0)

This is great, plus it sounds like back home in Arizona. Living in the poor part with all the Mexicans, I've seen a lot of bald spics with tattos.(10)

I like the second and third lines, but the rest needs to be worked on. Again you repeat the sentiment too often without progessing.

We are always able if we are aware.

What has been changed in this edit? I can't spot the difference between this version and the previous version.

This is very clever.

Whammo. Golden Calf Award!