Miggy
on some deleted poem
15 Jun 2003, 7:57 AM
just great, enough said
squeaky dissertation
nutcase. and not far from right.
Also... Three dots are better than 4.
I'm with squiggles. spot on.
horus... horus... tsk tsk.
Haiku (freeverse) by bike
In this poem?
You represent god.
Could you tell?
get a life..too much repition. try going to a church, there is infinite love there, after all it was god who gave his son. And only you can decide what it is you are to be. so make someting of it2
I'm changing my 2 to a 7, because you deserve better here. You've paid your dues, and this piece stood its ground, and it still does. I would make it an 8, but I hate tylenol, because my cousin died of Ryan's syndrome.
"are you john? or is there another john we don't know about". Look John, you have two 10's, and a 9nsky? I think people are well on their way to appreciating the amount of mundane energy & feckless thought you coincidentally force feed your poetry, and us. Good work.
If you punctuated your I's and and grammarically scrutinized over an edit you'd, I believe, get the marks that this deserves.
i still dont really understand haiku but thats ok..i still liked it...lol
Nicely done, did you know that I was the first person on this site to group together sets of haikus to tell a broader story? Now you do. My only red mark would be
"The prettiest one,
Everyone meets in their life,
That captures them so."
Using one right before everyone? And then again later, unless your title was "one" then it might work, but not here. Change second stanza's "one" into a stronger none, or verb, such as nymph, thing, love, girl, can, upholestry, get my drift? Otherwise 8. Now leave me alone.
i like that..i give it a 10....it made me laugh...alot...
A little tungsten in cheek, no?
To do
-----
1. Find exotic-sounding word in dictionary.
2. Write another identical, tedious love song.
Great title, great moniker. poor poem . IPK's right.
try again.
a bird in a cage cannot fly.
I think you could do without the last two lines