replying on Paper Maker by Skamper
19 Oct 2007, 5:15 AM
it's taken me a while to get a hang of the preposition thing - and to notice your comments...thanks.. :)
replying on The Search by Skamper
19 Oct 2007, 5:12 AM
yeah, it needs sharpening...looking back
on inside the raven by PsydewaysTears
14 Oct 2007, 7:53 PM
nice work - lurking evil in a gently lulling tune... always the trap. :)
replying on The Friendship Storm by x0lovelylarnx0
14 Oct 2007, 7:44 PM
Ok...you have an idea in your head of what you want to write and it seems to me you use terms that are overused and very familiar to what the public will see. Instead of thinking about what YOU see, you create the scene that's easily recognisible but totally worn out. If you write just for the recognition then you need to relax and find your own style - because this is fairly generic.
replying on back o' the fridge by nypoet22
14 Oct 2007, 7:34 PM
I know the idea of what it was in the back o' the fridge isn't really important for this poem, but would you humour me (more like my daughter who I read this to) and put a name to it... :)
on Solstice, 2007 by lectricprincess
13 Oct 2007, 9:47 PM
a pure pleasure to read -
on back o' the fridge by nypoet22
13 Oct 2007, 9:43 PM
as natural as a dancer...loved it
on The Devil and I by forsaken
13 Oct 2007, 9:34 PM
disjointed and lacking any kind of rhythm I could find (maybe just my two left brains)
on The Friendship Storm by x0lovelylarnx0
13 Oct 2007, 9:28 PM
this is very bland - you need to drop such overused phrases and take what is in your head and write it in your own words...don't worry about what other people rate your work, it's not that important...honestly you seem to want to play to the masses instead of just playing.
replying on A Patch of Time by Skamper
13 Oct 2007, 9:16 PM
I see it now - and I got the tenses wrong...feels should be felt - thankyou :)
replying on Tropical afternoon by cpill
25 Sep 2007, 10:42 PM
Not insulted at all - I quite like being ambigious even with gender.
replying on Tropical afternoon by cpill
25 Sep 2007, 10:41 PM
Much better images...menstruation is a feeling all to it's own...I should write about it...
I do like this write - it's quiet way of getting the message across...
I do like this write - it's quiet way of getting the message across...
on Death of a Drug Addict by SupremeDreamer
25 Sep 2007, 10:35 PM
damn sad
on Empathy with the childhood dreams by Prince of Void
25 Sep 2007, 10:32 PM
The last two lines had me nodding in agreement - some lives gain very little, and others nothing at all.
on Matter of Will by forsaken
25 Sep 2007, 10:29 PM
At first read I thought you were writing this as a writer - with total control of what your written characters do, but now I'm not so sure. Towards the end you give the impression of being forced into an action that will make you the person every-one thinks you are...Still confused - but I like a challenge...
on Lost Soul Place by sonawrote
25 Sep 2007, 10:25 PM
I like the rhyme for this write - it reminds me of something I just can't put my finger on...take this to it's darkest edge with a hint of the evil that resides within lonely soul place. It's almost macabre...( a few typos too need fixing)
on Ad Infinitum by MacFrantic
25 Sep 2007, 10:21 PM
gloomy - and I feel the need to rush to the defence of being alive.
on Still Life by thetrev
25 Sep 2007, 10:18 PM
I feel I want to read more into this than what is apparant - I will take it at face value and maybe add just hint of human emotion to it. I enjoyed it - scene well captured
on Stuck in Re-Verse by Alex Green
19 Aug 2007, 4:46 AM
go to the music shop and find some Cake, take it home, listen to it...sigh...