This is sweet.

The comments on this poem have become seriously deranged.... I just like the story of your poem. Drugging your lovers is the best way of maintaining a relationship. But the first stanza doesn't rhyme in my accent - we say 'sconn' not 'scown'. Please be more considerate of your southern English readers.

I don't really understand what's going on here, but the sound of the verse is lovely.

my necrophilia poem was better. the "limp hair" bit makes me think of a shampoo ad. "stand up and at your open coffin and smile"is a little awkward."I look at how your eyes gently fall upon the other." makes very little sense. Also, a body in a coffin has been embalmed. its lips aren't salty, they're chemically. They're only salty if they're very fresh, more if they're sweaty or bloody or have tears spilled on them. I'm only saying, objectively of course, that you should get the mechanics of death right before you write.

How dare you post a description o me and then pretend that it is P&K! How you know these things about me I couldn't say, but the likeness is frightening.

This is the kind of dream that could send a man mad. Please let this not be P&K, for I shall fear him even more

This is my favourite of yours becuase that lost innocnence and the fracturing of the self that goes with it comes out so loud and clear. Your focus is much tighter than usual and the poem really benefits from it. This is great.

England expects every man to do his duty....

I disagree with your last two lines as well. I don't think every ear is tuned out, and don't believe that people fear poets of any kind - marginalise, maybe. And I don't know about the correlation of depression and poetry, I think it's a connection that can be made too facilely. But alomsot all poetry has a consciousness of death behind it somewhere (otherwise why write anything down at all?) and I think that is your mouse of truth for me.

very nice. :) It warms my heart that you've found poemranker to be helpful. :) I really should make the "editing" system a little more of a system, though. versioning or something. bleah.

I don't get it.

Cute, cute, cute, cute, as usual coming from you D.A. Strange I must admit, interesting yes, so I'll give I a 6. JK that just sounded good, I give em an 8!! =) "hi hoe hi hoe it's off to work I go" Gotta go back to school, joy. But cute poem!! =)

I can't believe that I haven't voted on this poem despite suggesting titles and god knows what else - what an oversight. Did you check out some Ted Hughes?

for the bon jovi quote, dark angel, you shall get eternal raisinless bagels and attractive busty wenches. As for this poem, Dream Machine, visit the Chuch of Euthanasia site. They will help you fix your pain.

I wonder if the room with walls the colour of heartblood is actually a metaphor for your heart? The alliteration of 'w' is good, creating the effect of the woind. And don't get rid of the definite articles because they give this poem a knotty, medieval rhythm that sits well with the wolves.

What are stolen lips? Give them back. The last line makes no sense - your eyes may never grasp courts? the nocturnal companion courts something that the eys will enver grasp? I've never seen eyes grasping anything anyway - yeuurch.

king solomon would just break a stick of gum up and breast feed till minionable.l

dude..that's fucked. lol! got me there...oh well if it makes you feel better my hairs down to my shoulders i have a jesus beard and gonohorea...the hair goes tomorrow though..the clap went today..as for deepness..well nothing could match your recoils..lucky i'm busy repairing currently..otherwise well...i'd have to mail bomb your ass..love the zodiac killer. clark kent is dead bros..could i be the flash instead...fucking bastard. dirty pool..clay pigeon. i guess i can't vote on this one..it's pretty incriminatingly faceted..how would you say 'check mate..nice parle'. nightflier.k

Sounds like my kind of girl

Witty - 'Dawson's Creek' should always be flipped from.