Comments byDovina, 1641–1660 back, including replies. Only comments on poems

replying on Sunlighting by ALChemy 10 Jan 2006, 11:28 AM
See what I mean. He's not sorry.
replying on Sunlighting by ALChemy 10 Jan 2006, 11:21 AM
Then tell him to argue, and to quit calling me a blathering moron and walking off. Do you think your entertainment should be free?
replying on Sunlighting by ALChemy 10 Jan 2006, 11:12 AM
You never played the peacemaker for zodiac and me. Is one of us not "good people"?
on the light of a truly bright day by digipoet 10 Jan 2006, 10:58 AM
I agree. But a clever twist would be nice - maybe, A bright cloudy day, or somesuch.
on Tulip by richa 10 Jan 2006, 10:52 AM
with neither a purse nor a name
or
with not a purse or a name
on Oh Verrazano by Joe-joe 10 Jan 2006, 10:37 AM
Maybe it should be "low wage" rather than "no wage."
And maybe "fell from her" not "for her."
replying on What Matters by Dovina 10 Jan 2006, 10:16 AM
That's good! How do you find all this stuff?
on portrait of powerlessness by digipoet 9 Jan 2006, 8:37 PM
Try leaving off the last line, or make it the title.
on I, Ann Boleyn by http://mulberryfairy 9 Jan 2006, 8:30 PM
Funny
replying on Bloody Stools 'n' Butterflies by EAger to Offend 9 Jan 2006, 7:15 PM
They're not in the same ballgame. I think this one has something to say.
on Cocoon by Caducus 9 Jan 2006, 7:13 PM
You've caped all line beginnings except Line 4.
Thirty two should be thirty-two.

I like hso hoping/longing in the last few lines.
on Reckoning by <~> 9 Jan 2006, 7:07 PM
"I have ifs, and you have me," What a way to live. Yet it's too often true.
on Uncontrolled scribblings one luch break by Nicholas Jones 9 Jan 2006, 7:02 PM
Get your grammar somewhere close to common acceptance, and I'll say something about what you said.
on [] by Prince of Void 9 Jan 2006, 7:00 PM
I hate all this giddy positive attitude psychology in the face of despair. Can't you just show the empty abomination in everything and the voidness of even thinking of anything as good or bad?
on The Dark Days of Aristotle by somemorepoetry 9 Jan 2006, 6:49 PM
The world was too populated or Aristotle, and today not populated enough, some say. Think I'll go east, back to the green hills of Tennessee.
replying on What Matters by Dovina 8 Jan 2006, 4:05 PM
Good guess, but he could be King Kong for all it matters.
on Pledge by http://mulberryfairy 8 Jan 2006, 4:04 PM
This is a comical turn on what we all do as writers. I laughed at myself, and that makes it a therapeutic read.
on Flicking by INTRANSIT 8 Jan 2006, 3:59 PM
Not sure apex is what you mean, try spiral. And maybe curves should be curve. Otherwise good.
on do i know you? by daggatolar 8 Jan 2006, 3:53 PM
This is good except for Line 2, which can go, I think.
replying on Sunlighting by ALChemy 6 Jan 2006, 11:36 AM
I thought, mistakenly it seems, that you wanted constructively intended feedback. I only said it should be a complete sentence because all the other sentences in the poem are complete. Having this oddball "sentence" seemed jarring to me. If that's bad feedback, then what can I say?