on Ghosts by unknown^user
9 May 2004, 11:33 AM
Love the piece. Hate the commas.
on Vodka kisses & the final sigh, v.II (bloody vodka remix) by SupremeDreamer
8 May 2004, 1:13 PM
Better beat, verbage. Quite.
replying on clay or mud (hertz donut version) by nentwined
6 May 2004, 1:28 PM
very well, then.
on clay or mud (hertz donut version) by nentwined
6 May 2004, 1:20 PM
A. Where is the other version? Searched. Came up penniless.
B. Are you regressing to high school with the donut thing.
Good but not quite you, this time.
B. Are you regressing to high school with the donut thing.
Good but not quite you, this time.
on Beard my Homemade Negro Jesus (Improved! With AIDS!) by Everyone
6 May 2004, 7:01 AM
3 for length. 3 for humour. 2 for Max Headroom. 2 for Woostuh. -2 for the off beat stanzas. 1 for nuttyness.
replying on Everglades parkway by INTRANSIT
6 May 2004, 6:09 AM
imho? still not familiar with that one. sorry.
replying on Everglades parkway by INTRANSIT
6 May 2004, 6:08 AM
That's the wierd thing. The actual event happened in sort of slow motion so I went space crazy in the first. I loved it that way but something still didn't seem right. I can't argue with squiggles about the crit either though. This will be the second poem I have overanalyzed/overworked, which honestly pains me more than dropping it and moving on. im so cornfused.
replying on Everglades parkway by INTRANSIT
5 May 2004, 7:48 PM
Yes. And the old version is still up for comparison. Thanks for noticing. not icing. hmmm.
replying on Everglades parkway by INTRANSIT
5 May 2004, 7:45 PM
Great name!! It is rare that I get as far south as Brunswick or
Fla. I think I shall take the name and remind myself to practice a little more story telling in the future. Thanks again. Might run into you some time. Not literally, of course.
Fla. I think I shall take the name and remind myself to practice a little more story telling in the future. Thanks again. Might run into you some time. Not literally, of course.
replying on Everglades parkway by INTRANSIT
5 May 2004, 6:56 PM
"Melbourne to Brunswick" perhaps? Great Idea. I looked at the map. Lousy names.
on Beard my Homemade Negro Jesus (Improved! With AIDS!) by Everyone
5 May 2004, 2:28 PM
I kept one 'cos I'm broke.
replying on Beard my Homemade Negro Jesus (Improved! With AIDS!) by Everyone
5 May 2004, 2:27 PM
Here's one
Fraser
Allonby
Board (of)
Innumerable
Offenses
The F.A.B.I.O.
Fraser
Allonby
Board (of)
Innumerable
Offenses
The F.A.B.I.O.
on The Towel Head Blues by horus8
5 May 2004, 2:19 PM
I thought it said Eric fucking Stoli....oooopsie.
replying on On the Discovery of High Noon and The Devil in a Glass Jar. by MacFrantic
5 May 2004, 2:17 PM
I'm sorry it wasn't you who wrote the frog thing. Just the name alone puts my asthma into overtime.
on When she beats me by Win
5 May 2004, 1:59 PM
needs a bit of a hint as to what woman we are dealing with here. mom? sis? girlfriend? other? It is worthy of the effort.
replying on Everglades parkway by INTRANSIT
5 May 2004, 1:55 PM
It will recieve a much better title. When I find one.
(Rummaging through fat backs' bin) Nope. not here.
(Rummaging through fat backs' bin) Nope. not here.
replying on Working at the Garden Market by jessicazee
5 May 2004, 5:41 AM
Normally, I'm not that lazy. Thanks.
on Working at the Garden Market by jessicazee
4 May 2004, 5:45 PM
impatiens?
on Vodka kisses & the final sigh. by SupremeDreamer
4 May 2004, 2:30 PM
Yes. Small nits. Stogies-dump'em. Cigar even works better. Lose (quite) add comma.
The bloody morning-suggesting a bloody mary, excellent.
Over all 01.
The bloody morning-suggesting a bloody mary, excellent.
Over all 01.