on Disable by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
25 Apr 2005, 4:04 AM
you crack me up
on some deleted poem
24 Dec 2004, 1:05 AM
He never found love after praying for it, believing in god raped him of belief in love (and god).
on Recognition by nentwined
17 Jan 2005, 2:37 AM
You've managed to create one of those sayings like twain or wilde and done so in the limits of a haiku so brrrravo its def one of the best on here.
on Rendered Genderless by PsydewaysTears
18 Jan 2005, 6:53 AM
Everything seemed good till Stza 4 which reminded me of whitney houston and that is not good. However the rests peachy.
on some deleted poem
19 Jan 2005, 1:07 AM
Always admired your wordplay and how your poems unfold and resonate. This is beautiful.
on some deleted poem
28 Jan 2005, 1:23 AM
monogamy even (what an ass)
on Loss by <{Baba^Yaga}>
11 Feb 2005, 1:40 AM
this is amazing, truly awesome.
on Garage sale by INTRANSIT
18 Feb 2005, 1:17 AM
The ants are people right?
As always a wealth of meaning with a poverty of words how d'ya do it trucker?
Did u get my email?
As always a wealth of meaning with a poverty of words how d'ya do it trucker?
Did u get my email?
on some deleted poem
18 Feb 2005, 9:13 AM
I will try and be as brief as possible as readers should be able to adopt there own unique interpretation and adapt it to there own circumstances.
The poem is about a woman who falls in love with the man she wants - not the man he is. Therefore he fails to keep her happy and tries to be 'the masterpiece' she has drawn and picture sin her mind. The mind and heart however are different things one feels and one thinks/sees. The reference 'the madonna of the rocks' was a painting Nuns commissioned Leonardo da vinci to do, they were very specific in how and what was supposed to be in the picture. Da vinci however being himself added his views, himself pretty much into the poem and was chastized for it displaying controversial and blasphemous images and depictions of 'Madonna'. He therefore had to re-paint it to the order they wanted. This is interesting because artists put their 'blank canvass' on a pedestal (much like we are a blank canvass at the beginnings of a relationship) and the artist creates their own interpretation of something that was/is real (for instance the lover) the title is relevant here as is the point that behind her painting the true picture is hidden (the person he is) tears wash away these layers revealing his true self, who he is (her anomaly, her fake an abberation) in short we cannot choose who falls in love with us, but we must be sure they love us for who we are or we become not just their anomaly but also ours.
Its about being who we are and not how we're pictured. Da vincis poertait of Madonna Of the rocks is a good example of someone creative who is admired but then hated for creating 'a masterpiece of disappointment' - that masterpiece is who we truly are.
I hope thats helped it is a very deep poem.
The poem is about a woman who falls in love with the man she wants - not the man he is. Therefore he fails to keep her happy and tries to be 'the masterpiece' she has drawn and picture sin her mind. The mind and heart however are different things one feels and one thinks/sees. The reference 'the madonna of the rocks' was a painting Nuns commissioned Leonardo da vinci to do, they were very specific in how and what was supposed to be in the picture. Da vinci however being himself added his views, himself pretty much into the poem and was chastized for it displaying controversial and blasphemous images and depictions of 'Madonna'. He therefore had to re-paint it to the order they wanted. This is interesting because artists put their 'blank canvass' on a pedestal (much like we are a blank canvass at the beginnings of a relationship) and the artist creates their own interpretation of something that was/is real (for instance the lover) the title is relevant here as is the point that behind her painting the true picture is hidden (the person he is) tears wash away these layers revealing his true self, who he is (her anomaly, her fake an abberation) in short we cannot choose who falls in love with us, but we must be sure they love us for who we are or we become not just their anomaly but also ours.
Its about being who we are and not how we're pictured. Da vincis poertait of Madonna Of the rocks is a good example of someone creative who is admired but then hated for creating 'a masterpiece of disappointment' - that masterpiece is who we truly are.
I hope thats helped it is a very deep poem.
on Corner Shop, 5 Quinton Road by Caducus
25 Feb 2005, 3:19 AM
I'm such a bastard should i keep it open and add it to my woefully low 'happy' collection.
on Yesterdays testament by Caducus
30 Mar 2005, 3:06 AM
partly inspired by Sylvia Plath's 'The Rival'
only in draft form.
only in draft form.
on some deleted poem
5 Apr 2005, 7:21 AM
I really warmed to this one. It unfolds slowly like a bud then tulip bang !
One thing lines 6-7 you need only one 'and'.
Strong.
One thing lines 6-7 you need only one 'and'.
Strong.
on some deleted poem
8 Apr 2005, 7:31 AM
your one of a few who's style gets me each time.
this has a beauty.
this has a beauty.
on some deleted poem
8 Apr 2005, 7:39 AM
It flows fine but the openings very weak and as a lyric it holds merit but as a poem it just dont bang.
on Baggage (3rd ending) by INTRANSIT
20 Apr 2005, 8:28 AM
Would slap me sideways with a briefer last line.
on Baggage (3rd ending) by INTRANSIT
20 Apr 2005, 8:28 AM
drop the - 'on what we' that'll help for starters
on Sudden Change by Dovina
20 Apr 2005, 8:30 AM
Weird how the opening line seemed long but was ironed out by fiorst line of second stanza. The last line is sheer brilliance hope they interpret it as i did (wrong or not).
on some deleted poem
20 Apr 2005, 8:31 AM
chop out the telling bits and this could be good.
on Country Song by Caducus
22 Apr 2005, 7:40 AM
if you play this backward sit has a happy ending.