on Revelation ( 666 ) by Mr Pig
7 Mar 2003, 7:36 AM
5
5
4
what gives?
5
4
what gives?
on Crucifixion by Mr Pig
7 Mar 2003, 7:33 AM
4
7
6
nice thought, though.
7
6
nice thought, though.
on Greek Tragedy#1 by Mr Pig
26 Feb 2003, 5:24 AM
I like it.
as for present conversation here, I will say nothing ten times.
there.
as for present conversation here, I will say nothing ten times.
there.
replying on A Lost Friend by Ray
25 Feb 2003, 7:19 AM
as much as I'd like to blame them on brain injury, they were more of an attempt to repeat the glory of the first. The 2nd and 3rd "less than a sentence" were extremely difficult to settle on, whereas the 1st was a moment of purity. I felt like an 80's one hit wonder band trying to recapture the glory with the other two. my apologies. Also, I apologize for lying about having an accident. It was a bullshit excuse for bad typing skills.
on (untitled) by Ray
24 Feb 2003, 2:41 PM
Hope it wasn't something I said. :)
Nice use of form, a bit heavy on the assonance--beware of sounding too sing-songy. 6.
Nice use of form, a bit heavy on the assonance--beware of sounding too sing-songy. 6.
on A Lost Friend by Ray
24 Feb 2003, 2:38 PM
Don't be discouraged. Keep trying. We are all trying.
replying on A Lost Friend by Ray
24 Feb 2003, 2:30 PM
Sorry I don't type so well since my accident. I'm still getting used to using one elbow and one foot on the modified keyboard. The Doctors think I am coming along nicely.
replying on A Lost Friend by Ray
24 Feb 2003, 12:31 PM
I meant "theraputic writing".
on A Lost Friend by Ray
24 Feb 2003, 12:28 PM
YAWN. bo-ring. theraputing wring is a nice thing to do, but too often folks think it is good for sharing. keep these to yourself. write about something new.
on "loveless life" by Jaketiger
24 Feb 2003, 12:25 PM
plagued by typos (such as "traped" and "tstay"), it makes it tough to read and detracts from any poetic quality. cut the redundancies and tighten up your language. try some images--similes, metaphors--fresh ones not "daggar of fate" trite stuff. push yourself. don't be afraid.
replying on Suicidal thoughts by CrAzYlAdY Surukain
24 Feb 2003, 8:39 AM
What a twisted thing to say. I hope you didn't mean that. It goes against the laws of nature.
on Dear Mr. Poetry, could you hold my purse? <how does babbit do it> by horus8
21 Jan 2003, 7:36 AM
except for the shouting, i like this. I think the "!"s could go.
on OK, I apologize - it's steaming shite and no mistake, but it was the best I could come up with on the spur of the moment. I'm off to slit my wrists now, since writer's block has sent me spiralling into the depths of the deepest depression in human history... by Yardbird
17 Jan 2003, 11:38 AM
I hope you don't hurt yourself. It isn't the right thing to do. I like this limerick lots and lots and I hope you stick around and write more.
on anonymous guy by sooz
17 Jan 2003, 11:34 AM
as i knotted his noose
(simply becasue he couldn't scream and dangle) otherwise, I like this! a valiant job. 9.
(simply becasue he couldn't scream and dangle) otherwise, I like this! a valiant job. 9.
on gerbil by betty swallox
17 Jan 2003, 11:33 AM
cute.
on late night activities by sooz
17 Jan 2003, 11:31 AM
again, line lengths disrupt what the rhythm should be.
on Perversions 3: Payback by razorgrin
17 Jan 2003, 11:30 AM
get rid of "who" in the first one,
and th elast one, while the premise is good, doesn't seem to flow as well as the others. overall, an 8
and th elast one, while the premise is good, doesn't seem to flow as well as the others. overall, an 8
second - 4.5
average- 6.