on some deleted poem
16 Feb 2007, 11:32 AM
cherry blossom and wood, with a midnight encounter? clever, but they play against each other somewhat comically--or maybe that's just my mood.
Gyring? Kudos if you actually meant it.
Good "round and round and round". Overall, too plain. Carry the metaphors through?
Gyring? Kudos if you actually meant it.
Good "round and round and round". Overall, too plain. Carry the metaphors through?
on some deleted poem
19 Feb 2007, 1:44 PM
I can't but help think that's not where it ends. But definitely you've captured something. I want it to wrap back on itself, somehow, be less just two contrasting slices.
on DIDN'T I SAY by massangel62
19 Feb 2007, 3:51 PM
Maybe you have different definitions of love. It's a sentiment, but doesn't do so well as a poem.
on A Mothers Heart by TAMARAG67
19 Feb 2007, 3:52 PM
ack
on IT All Starts With My Fears by tisa7
19 Feb 2007, 3:53 PM
A list of your fears might be more interesting.
on An Arrow and a Knife by blues
19 Feb 2007, 3:54 PM
interesting.
on A Dance by D. $ Fontera
19 Feb 2007, 3:55 PM
cute; I can't quite make sense of it but I like what's there.
on The Reason by frdup717
19 Feb 2007, 3:55 PM
ow.
on Coward has a tail by LintyWeenis
19 Feb 2007, 4:01 PM
cute. :)
on Night High by LintyWeenis
19 Feb 2007, 4:02 PM
very interesting. nice flow, too.
on The Plague of Being by D. $ Fontera
19 Feb 2007, 4:03 PM
eh
on Cold Feet by gregsamsa222
19 Feb 2007, 4:04 PM
I really like this.
on I'M STILL IN LOVE WITH YOU by massangel62
19 Feb 2007, 4:14 PM
die die die
on Lying in the Snow, Crazy? Yes. by D. $ Fontera
19 Feb 2007, 4:15 PM
hmm.
on Harvester of Sorrow by frdup717
19 Feb 2007, 4:16 PM
Maybe a nice quick lyric.
on The exile returns by wFraser Allonby Q.C.w
22 Feb 2007, 11:10 AM
Welcome back. :)
Cute. But doesn't do it for me.
Minus a point for not having "fish" as per rockmage.
Extra point for the word "Gortices".