on The Spaz by ?-Dave_Mysterious-?
13 Jul 2004, 2:54 AM
Splendid. This is the best poeme about Spags ever.
replying on Brando's Dead (slight reprise) by ?-Dave_Mysterious-?
12 Jul 2004, 12:50 AM
Stick Stick Stick Stick. Is the gameshow host Bob Carolgies?
on A Child Once More by Quarton
9 Jul 2004, 1:21 AM
Childhood was the most painful time of my life.
It was only later that I learned that pain was caused the huge growth of my vast penis causing a massive strain on my pelvic floor. It was not until I was diagnosed as having the largest cock in the whole world that I was able to apply for a grant from local government to have a brace made for my legs and back to support the colossal weight of my huge throbbing member. So I will thank you not to write about childhood without reference to children who are afflicted with such terrible afflictions.
And what about the islamists, eh?
It was only later that I learned that pain was caused the huge growth of my vast penis causing a massive strain on my pelvic floor. It was not until I was diagnosed as having the largest cock in the whole world that I was able to apply for a grant from local government to have a brace made for my legs and back to support the colossal weight of my huge throbbing member. So I will thank you not to write about childhood without reference to children who are afflicted with such terrible afflictions.
And what about the islamists, eh?
replying on My Friend Burgers by ?-Dave_Mysterious-?
7 Jul 2004, 11:39 AM
If you were to ever meet Fraser you would find his swollen corpulent legs so risible as to render your comment redundant.
As it is unlikely you ever will let me describe for you a recent account of him visting his tailor:
Fraser: "I should like a suit please"
Tailor: "And how do you propose I measure sirs legs sir?"
Fraser: "I don't know"
Tailor: "Does sir have a trundle wheel?"
As it is unlikely you ever will let me describe for you a recent account of him visting his tailor:
Fraser: "I should like a suit please"
Tailor: "And how do you propose I measure sirs legs sir?"
Fraser: "I don't know"
Tailor: "Does sir have a trundle wheel?"
replying on Why you don't fall through the floor by ?-Dave_Mysterious-?
7 Jul 2004, 8:44 AM
If I could access the damn chat cave I would tell you at length why MC Hammer was as good as Snow on his 1991 album smash "12 inches of Snow". Neither were as good as Skee Lo, who in turn was like a quivering gay in front of the awesome "spaz with a keyboard" Wesley Wallis.
replying on Why you don't fall through the floor by ?-Dave_Mysterious-?
7 Jul 2004, 8:29 AM
They are both whack. Jazzy Jeff is by far the best hip hop artist of his generation.
replying on Absolute Truth (about Quarton) by ?-Dave_Mysterious-?
7 Jul 2004, 4:53 AM
Under the new censored regime I may only say that your comments are valid and well structured and that your poem although not techincally a limerick had me weepng. Under the old regime, I would have told you "you are a sorry pool of discarded flange gravy".
on blobby sums +-*/ by MR Blobby
5 Jul 2004, 3:35 AM
You simpering half wit.
on Worst Sex Ever by Brittanyy
5 Jul 2004, 2:01 AM
You are a slapper.
on Helo everybody is limerck time!! by DR Limerick
2 Jul 2004, 6:14 AM
You are a prize clot.
on Lady Bradburyâs Excursion by Dovina
2 Jul 2004, 3:33 AM
Absolutely splendid.
replying on The Weaver's Curse by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
1 Jul 2004, 1:05 AM
And as -=Dark_Angel=-,P.I. turns to leave the lecture theatre at the local co-operative colledge, his audible "harrumph" signfying an end to his menstruation, his gravitas is slightly undone by the noise his brand new pumps make on the polished floor.
replying on Ethnic Smells by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
30 Jun 2004, 6:31 AM
Your dedication to guffranker.com is admirable - most people touring the far east would be emptying themselves into the local nightlife. However as you are probably still encased in a pair of deep vein thrombosis tights following the 12 hr flight I beleive you have been most wise not to feast on the local victuals.
replying on The Weaver's Curse by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
30 Jun 2004, 6:27 AM
I attained 22 UCAS points including General Studies - Touché.
replying on The Weaver's Curse by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
30 Jun 2004, 1:38 AM
Shan't. And it's no good you spurting your curd and getting all excited because someone called a spade a negro.
In point of fact my comment was extremely valid, this haiku did not provide the foundation stone of the reverential harness which now adorns your mishapen frame. Indeed your early poetry is massively disappointing, EVEN after your attempts to reduce the amount of cod on your user page.
-6-
In point of fact my comment was extremely valid, this haiku did not provide the foundation stone of the reverential harness which now adorns your mishapen frame. Indeed your early poetry is massively disappointing, EVEN after your attempts to reduce the amount of cod on your user page.
-6-
on Ethnic Smells by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
29 Jun 2004, 5:46 AM
Your first decent poeme.
on The Weaver's Curse by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
29 Jun 2004, 5:45 AM
You were still writing absolute shite.
on Oldfinger by -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
29 Jun 2004, 5:44 AM
You used to be really shit.
on Just One More Time by KatieKaBoom
28 Jun 2004, 6:21 AM
I should smite your face with a mighty cudgel for such a terrible poem. However as you remind me of the Katie to whose memory I still cling, like a pair of pants to an old man's crotch, I award you a fairly indifferent -7-